Tag: attraction

My Girlfriend Has Too Many Guyfriends

Published on by Chauntel Delgado1 Comment

21-year-old Ryan from Massachusetts writes:

Hi Chauntel!,

How are you? I had a few relationship questions.

1. I’ve been in a relationship with my girlfriend for about 2 months and everything is great. She is on the field hockey team at school and hangs out with a lot of kids on other sports teams. She says she’d never cheat, and alot of the baseball kids are her best friends…..is there a way I can handle this because honestly i’ve never dated a girl with so many good guy friends.

2. She isn’t very romantic and I am, is there a way to coax her into being more romantic or do I give her space and let her come to me?

3. Since this is all new and my last relationship was of 3 years, what advice to you have to keeping relationships fun, healthy and happy.

Hi Ryan,

I love your questions, and I will address them one at a time just as you have asked them.

1. If your girlfriend is in an environment with a lot of guys, that is ok. You have to have confidence within yourself and your relationship. The two of you just need to sit down and develop boundaries on what is appropriate within your relationship when comes to hangouts with the opposite sex. Once you two have agreed on what is appropriate you have to trust her. I know it is a hard thing to do, but you have to do it for the sake of your relationship. When and if those boundaries are crossed then that is when you actually have a problem, but for the time being don’t make it an issue. It is not.

2. In most relationships one person is usually more romantic than the other. That is ok. It works out better that way because one person balances the other out. Now, the problem is when she is not willing to be romantic with you, but if she is in the moment with you and enjoying it, stop complaining. It is ok that you are the initiator. In fact, that is even better because you are the guy. But again, this is not a problem so don’t make it one.

3. Wow, you’re third question is a loaded one. I could probably write a book on it, but we will do what we can here. To keep a relationship fun, healthy and fresh you have to include excitement in what you do. Celebrate the little things. Compliment each other often. Always be in tune to what the other person is feeling. Don’t just listen to what they say, but watch their body language. Stay in tune with their emotions. Never, get into such a routine that you never do anything spontaneous. Think out of the box and find little ways to surprise each other. Communication is the key ingredient to this. If you have good communication and stay in tune with your mates emotions you will have the best chance at a healthy, fun, and happy relationship.

I also have an article that I wrote entitled: 10 Ways To Build a New Successful Relationship

Email questions to askchauntel@gmail.com

http://www.askchauntel.com

I Don’t Know How to Be Friends With My Ex

Published on by Chauntel Delgado1 Comment

24-year-old John from Dallas writes:

Hi  Chauntel,

I broke up with my ex in February because i wanted to finish my associate degree (which i did) and work full time to save for a car (in which i dont have yet). We’ve been great friends since. We still talk great. No sex involved. Some days I want it back. Some days i only want general sex with women i DONT care for. How do I know if we should try it again? Or if I need to be single?

Follow-up Question from Chauntel to John:

Hi John,

Those days that you “want it back” what is it that you are missing or wanting?
Those days that you “don’t care for her,” why is that?
Reply from John:

I want back the fact that I only need to worry about her and not making a handful of women happy.

On single days I like to flirt and know that if I had sex with a girl, another wouldn’t get offended. There would be no commitment.

Image
by by artur84

Chauntel’s Response:

Hi John,

I think it is great that you and your ex have remained friends, that is so important. However, I am not convinced that you are ready to be in a relationship.

I think it is comfortable for you to be with her, and that is why “some days” you like it. You are not that into her. It is nice that you are worried about her, but you cannot feel guilted into a relationship with her. That is not fair to either of you. She will end up being hurt in the long run if you continue to walk the line. Don’t send her mixed signals. If you guys are friends, then don’t make her feel like it is more. That is torture.

I also think you are just fearful of moving on.

Don’t mess up your friendship with her, unless you are sure that you actually want to pursue a relationship with her. If you do, both of you will end up hurt.

You are in the mood to play the field, and that’s ok. The only time that becomes a problem is if you put yourself in a committed relationship. Don’t do it.

I know that you enjoy the comfort of a girl to come home to, but you cannot have that and play the field. You have to choose one or the other. I would not advise you to jump back into a relationship with her. Give yourself sometime. You are obviously searching for something that you did not find in that relationship. Continue to respect her.

Don’t “accidently” have sex with her one-night and say it just happened, because guess what it will mean much more to her than it just being an accident. You seem like a nice guy so don’t force this.

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel

Email questions to: askchauntel@gmail.com

http://www.askchauntel.com

9 Things a Girl Should Never Say to Her Boyfriend!

Published on by Chauntel DelgadoLeave a comment

http://youtu.be/i3A2rO2B6DA

10 is laugh at him! Chauntel gives women advice on 9 things they should never say to their boyfriend. Funny! Watch! askchauntel@gmail.com http://www.askchauntel.com

Ask Chauntel Radio Starts Next Thursday July 11 at 3pm

Published on by Chauntel DelgadoLeave a comment

Hey Beautiful People!

Ask Chauntel Radio is here! Ever wanted to talk to Chauntel directly, for free? Now is your chance, call into her radio show with your question every Thursday, beginning July 11, at 3:00pm PCT. She would love to speak to you! To listen in logon towww.blogtalkradio.com/askchauntel

This weeks topic is: How should a girl show that she is interested? Vote

Listen Live to Ask Chauntel Radio by clicking here.

Here is the number to call in for Ask Chauntel Radio Next Thursday, July 11 at 3pm: (646) 929-1389
Here is where you logon: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/askchauntel/2013/07/25/dating-and-relationship-advice-from-ask-chauntel 

 

Weekly Ask Chauntel Poll: How should a girl show that she is interested?

Published on by Chauntel Delgado1 Comment

New Poll Every Friday!

What to Wear on a First Date – Fashion Advice – Ask Chauntel

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Chauntel shares tips on what you should think about when selecting your outfit for a first date. What should you wear for what occasion. What should you consider? Watch!
http://www.askchauntel.com
http://www.tacalista.com
http://www.forever21.com
askchauntel@gmail.com

The Law of Attraction

Published on by Chauntel Delgado1 Comment

14-year-old Nick writes:

Hey Chauntel, I just watched your video on how to approach a girl and stuff like that…. But my situation is a little bit tougher.. I’m 14, I just started high school this year and I noticed this girl kind of right off the bat as soon as I saw her she immediately drew my attention but I cannot get enough courage to talk to her everytime I try I get all nervous start to blush I get butterflies my mind goes all crazy so I back out and just not talk to her. I’ve never talked to this girl before bc of that reason and it’s almost the end of the school year and I’ve never said a word to her. What’s your advice on how to approach her for the first time without making me look like a fool and I can give her a good first impression on how I am?? And I guess I’m kind of pessimistic about this situation bc I doubt my chances of ever being able to date her when the time presents itself and I always think I’m not good enough and my looks aren’t good enough and I don’t wanna wait too long bc she could get swept up by another guy and I don’t want that /: so please if you could answer back with some advice on this situation ASAP it would help me soooo much (: hope to hear back soon!

Hi Nick,

Have you heard of the Law of Attraction? The gist of it is, if you think negatively you will attract negativity. So, if you keep thinking that you have a small chance to attract her, guess what you do.

So what I need you to do is stop thinking of yourself as never getting a chance with her, but start believing that she would be happy to have you.

If you step to a girl without confidence she is not going to take you seriously, and she will not be attracted to you. Also, this is not about putting on a show. All you have to do is be yourself.

As far as your looks go, although I am not sure how you look I want you to know in most cases it really doesn’t matter. I mean face it. Haven’t you seen plenty of beautiful girls with not so hot guys. Do you know why? It is because those girls are attracted to those guys based on that guys confidence. This is not to say that you are not attractive ok.

So moving on. What you need is a game plan. I don’t mean that you need to memorize how the conversation is going to go word for word. If you do that and it doesn’t go the way you planned you will choke.

Here is how you approach her: Walk up to her and say hello. Introduce yourself. Let her introduce herself. Then, give her a compliment. Then have small talk. It could be about anything.

Then create a sense of urgency. Make up an excuse as to why you have to go, or simply tell her that you have enjoyed talking to her, and you would like to get to know her better. This is the time that you ask her for her number. Then you tell her you will talk to her later, and off you go. Whatever you do, stop this negative self talk and believe in yourself. You will be glad you did.

Now, once you have done that you have approached her, and you have left a good thought in her mind of you. Need some help with the next conversation? I have a video for that:

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel

Re to BubzBeauty: How to Get a Guy to Like You

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Is there a guy that you are into, and you want to get his attention? Are you wondering what to do to get him to like you? Chauntel responds to Bubzbeauty’s video on How to Get a Guy to Like You! Watch! http://www.askchauntel.com askchauntel@gmail.com

Re: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-SwGfzg5nGY

How to Approach a Guy

Published on by Chauntel Delgado1 Comment

Ana from New York writes:

Hey Chauntel,

I really like this guy, but, I’m very nervous to talk to him. Even on facebook. lol. In person it’s easier, but Facebook, forget it. lol.

 What should I do?
ImageHi Ana,
Men, are pretty simple. They don’t get hints. However, they have big egos and like to take charge.
The problem that most men have when approaching a women is they fear rejection. So…all you have to do is open the door for him. Make it easier for him to converse with you. Don’t take his role, just encourage him along. How do you do that? You achieve this by outwardly flirting with him. You would be surprised what you can do without saying a word. Men aren’t always the best with communicating verbally, but most are pretty clear with physical communication. So, you need to improve on  expressing your emotions through communicating through body language.
First make eye contact. Make sure that he gets it. You should confirm 3 sure glances. Each time smile, with her chin down and your eyes up. If he is away from you wave at him.
Once he approaches you smile, and flick your hair back. Make some small talk, but do it in a hurry. You want to talk to him just long enough for him to be intrigued to get to know more about you. Then, you find a reason for why you have to leave, this creates a sense of urgency.
Follow this up with giving him your number. Let him know that you are looking forward to his call as you enjoyed your conversation. Then, leave. Get out of dodge.
As far as you being scared, or nervous oh well, you have to work through it. You cannot get what you want by hanging in the stands. You have to get in the game and play. That is just the way it is. Be confident and go get yo’ man girl!
I Hope This Helps!
Chauntel
askchauntel@gmail.com

Am I in An Abusive Relationship

Published on by Chauntel DelgadoLeave a comment

Heather writes:

Hi Chauntel,

I need to know if im in a abusive relationship can u help me?
when me nd my partner first met he bought me fowers chocolate nd put money into my bank account all the time, but since he has moved house with his friend he has changed, when we argue he grabbes me by my throught nd puts me on the floor nd drags me, he has never punched me or anything like that, he says he does it because he feel threatened when we argue he feels like im going to hit him when im not it has happened on 4 diffrent occasions, but last we we had an argument nd he threw me on the floor and opened the car door which hit me in the head then dragged me nd pushed me for about 20 mins then put me on the floor again then put me on the floor again after that nd screaming at me whilst im shoved in the corner nd his friend grabbed me by the throught but when he put me to the floor he grabbed me by the throught everytime, he done this because i asked for my car back that i lent him nd now he is refusing to giv it back because he had to replace the clutch,, i dont know weather to leave him or not, but now i finch at him and im scared to speak my opinion incase he gets angry but when he doesnt do this sort of thing hes really nice too me,, i really dont know what to do,, please help,,, thankyou
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