Category: Advice Columns

I wanted to share my response to Ask E. Jean Caroll’s advice column from Elle magazine. Here is the question:

Dear E. Jean: I’m a 25-year-old marine biologist researching dolphins in Southern California. This past year, I met a man and have fallen very deeply in love. (I didn’t think I was capable of it!) He’s extremely kind, generous, considerate, passionate, thoughtful, attractive, outdoorsy, and adventurous. But he is soon moving to Colorado to pursue his career in the Rocky Mountains. I’m happy that he will be doing what he loves, Miss Eeee, but I’m so sad to lose him! He feels the same about me. I’m not interested in a long-distance relationship—it seems irrational to commit to someone when we have no future plans to live in the same area. I’m so frustrated by it all! He wants to be in the mountains, and my life is by the sea. What are we to do? —Sidetracked in SoCal

Ask Chauntel Response:

Dear Sidetrack in SoCal,

What an exciting career that you have! Now, let me tell you love will make you do crazy things 🙂

If you are ready to be serious with him forget about your long distance limit, and try dating him while he is in the mountains. It will give you both time to see if you are ready for the next step, marriage. Once he is gone for a bit, you will know if you cannot see life without him. That way you will be confident in your decision on if he is the right one to make this huge change for and leave with no regrets. If you rush it before you are absolutely sure, then you might build resentment overtime.

So test out the process, brainstorm alternative careers in the mountains, visit him there and imagine if you can see yourself on the mountain peak away from sea. Then you will know if it is right. Love is worth a chance!

If you will be heartbroken from being separated from the thing you love most, then it would mean he is not the one. At least, you will know that love is possible for you!

If you think you can leave the sea for the mountain peak then my sister I tell you can find other creative ways to use your scientific knowledge out there, and hey if you are in SoCal the beach isn’t too far from the mountains so maybe you buy a home in both places and visit between together! What a fun life you will have!

There are ways to make love and career work together splendidly, the question is, is he the one worth the trouble? If the answer is yes then be flexible, and run away with the prince to find life as a forester fun and exciting. Who knows what adventures await!

Read E Jean’s response here.

Give Advice:

Don’t forget to give your advice on Sidetrack in SoCal’s relationship question below. This is a “Q and A” style response.

▶️ SUGGESTED VIDEO POST: Ask Ask Chauntel Radio: I Just Had My First Heartbreak — Where Do I Go From Here? Re: to Ask E Jean https://askchauntel.com/2019/11/02/ask-ask-chauntel-radio-i-just-had-my-first-heartbreak-where-do-i-go-from-here-re-to-ask-e-jean/

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