Why Won’t He Call Me His Girlfriend?

by marin

So the guy you have been dating is a little skeptical about “titles”.

You feel like you are in a relationship with him, yet he doesn’t quite call you his girlfriend. This reality leaves you dazed, confused, and sometimes a little frustrated. So What do you do?

You get upset about it, but he always seems to find a way to make you forget about it when you are around him. He knows just what to say, and when to say it. However, when you’re alone all you can do is dissect the situation and try to understand it.

Why won’t he call you his girlfriend? It’s simple. He doesn’t want to commit to you.

Then you ask, well how can that be and why not? When you begin asking these two questions your frustration will build. Why?

Well, if I give you the honest answer you won’t feel any better about the situation than you did before you asked, but since you want to know I guess I will share.

When it comes to a committed relationship, guys can sometimes be scared off by the idea of being “stuck” with one girl. In many cases they would just rather leave their options open.

So, if you are dating “that guy”, what should you do? Well you can chose to take one of two options. One you can accept him for who he is and not pressure the situation, while also keeping your options open and dating other guys. If you choose this option be sure to add value to his life, you don’t just want to be “another girl”. However, keep in mind this can only go on so long because eventually you will move on, if you do this right. Reason being, you should be dating other guys who are a viable option for you. If this guy really likes you he will shape up in time, right before you move on.

Your second option is friend-zone him, and find a guy who is actually in the mental space to want a committed relationship. They are out there waiting on you.

BUT..whatever you do, don’t just get into a relationship, just to be in one. Settling is so not cute!

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel

email questions to askchauntel@gmail.com

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Re to BubzBeauty: How to Get a Guy to Like You

Is there a guy that you are into, and you want to get his attention? Are you wondering what to do to get him to like you? Chauntel responds to Bubzbeauty’s video on How to Get a Guy to Like You! Watch! http://www.askchauntel.com askchauntel@gmail.com

Re: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-SwGfzg5nGY

Am I His Bootycall?

21-year-old Alia writes:

Hi Chauntel!

I have been a fan of your YouTube channel for quite a while now 🙂 Please Chauntel, I need your help.

A few weeks ago, me and a few of my friends went out clubbing. We were all just having a fun night out. That night, I bumped into one of my school mates from High School. We had a little chat and he asked me to dance with him, so I did. After dancing for quite some time, we chilled had a few drinks and he flirted and he tried to kiss me but I pushed him away. But we still hung around each other later on. Much later he accompanied me to send my friend back home.
Meanwhile, my friend was drunk and passed out in the car. So, I called for backup from my other friends. While they were on their way, me and him talked for quite a while and while we were talking he held me and wrapped his arms around me. He also mentioned that I looked “sexy” and that I’m “wild” compared to when I was in High School. The flirting was nice, I enjoyed it to be honest.
After helping my drunk friend, he sent me back home. He gave a kiss on the cheek but somehow I felt like we should kiss. So, I gave him the signal and we did.
The next day, he texted me asking me whether or not I’m busy later to get “busy” with him. But I just ignored it. And so we kept on talking for the next 3 days. During those 3 days, he insist on having sex with me and asked me for a “picture” of myself. In which, I did give him to be honest. But I wasn’t naked, I still had my underwear on. I don’t know, maybe at that time I just wanted to tease him. See what he does. However on the last day, we decided to meet up for coffee. We talked and he told me he’s leaving for a weekend vacation and mentioned that he wants a piece of me when he gets back.
While he’s on vacation, we never contacted each other. I also didn’t try to do anything cause I didn’t want to seem desperate or needy and give him space. But when he did get back, he never tried to get in touch with me. So, I wondered why. The next few days, I texted him to see how he was doing. He replied. Had a little chat. Then we hardly spoke for the next few weeks. I didn’t call or text nor did he.
However, 2 weeks ago, I thought I got into contact with him. I asked him what he’s doing. He said “Nothing, just chilling at home”. I asked “I’ll be having drinks with my friends at some bar if you wanna join”. He said he’ll think about it. But he also mentioned that he’s going on a trip the next morning with his friends, so I said “Its okay”. And we didn’t talk for the next few days.
Last week Thursday, he texted me seeing what am I up to. I said I was chilling with my girlfriends and he said he just got back from the trip. And we spoke a little, he said goodnight as did I. I didn’t hear from him on Friday and on Saturday. Nor did I try to do anything about it. So, on sunday, I texted him “Hey” and he hasn’t replied since.
HELP ME CHAUNTEL! Please. I don’t know what to do plus I’m also confused at times. Your advice is much appreciated. Thanks 🙂
womens legs by adam
photo courtesy of adamr
Hi Alia,
This guy is not interested in you. He is just using you for sexual favors.
I feel that you are looking for a relationship, and he is not. He is looking for someone to sleep with. It’s best for you to let this guy go and find someone who is on the same level as him of looking for a sexmate. That is not you.
You must be patient to find a guy who is also interested in a relationship. This guy will only end up hurting and disappointing you. You dig?
I Hope This Helps!
Chauntel
askchauntel@gmail.com

VIDEO: First Date Tips

What should girls do to get a guy to ask them out. Chauntel sits down with her cousin Avrum and talks about his first date. What should guys do to show a girl a good time? Watch! askchauntel@gmail.com

How to Get a Guy To text You Back!- Fun Friday

If a guy isn’t texting what should you do to get him to text back? What should you say?
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Article: 5 Tips to Text a Boy/Girl That You Just Met
https://askchauntel.com/2013/02/08/5-tips-on-what-do-you-text-a-boygirl-you-just-met/

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How to Tell if a Guy Likes You

15-year-old Apple writes:

Hi Chauntel,

I am in high school and I think a guy likes me but in not sure. My friends asked him before if he likes anyone and he said no but then his sister Asked him and he said he didn’t know. Does that mean he’s still trying to figure it out? Or does it mean he Doesn’t. Also me and my friend both like the same guy and I think he knows that. He mentioned something about going on a date with me, in front of me but idk if he was joking or not. I love your videos and I hope u reply!

Hi Jessica,

Hi Apple,
If he mentioned going out on a date with you infront of you then that means that he is interested in you. If he says that he doesn’t know, then it means just that. He probably doesn’t know you well enough to know if he likes you yet. The best thing to do is get to know him better by building a friendship with him. Flirt with him and see if he asks you to go out.
Here are a few videos that I think you might find helpful.
How to Date a Quiet Boy
 
Does He Like You

How To Attract a Guy When You are an Athlete

15-year-old Brooklyn from Canada writes:

Hey Chauntel,

I play numerous sports, get good grades, and am outgoing! But yet I still can’t attract a guy, my bestfriend has guys all over her and yet I can’t even interest one. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, help!

Hi Brook!

I am so glad that you are in sports! That is awesome both for your health and for your future. It is helpful for your health because you are getting great exercise! It is helpful for your future because if you keep working hard you may eventually get a scholarship. Also, it is good to involve yourself with an extracurricular activity as it keeps you busy and away from trouble.

As far as the guys go, they love athletic girls, but that should not be your reason for being an athlete. You should be an athlete because you love it, not because you hope to attract a guy. However, being an athelete will put you in the “cool” category in school most of the time, and it will make you more appealing to guys.

 Here is one thing that I want you to keep in mind, you should not be comparing yourself to your bestfriend. Sure it is easy to do that because she is your age, and you are around her all the time. But…you have to consider that fact that you are your own person. The fact that you are bestfriends must mean that you compliment eachother and are probably different in many ways. With that said, you should not worry about the guys that she is attracting. If you want a guy, they you have to create the opportunities for you to meet and be around them.

Now, granted being an athelete is attractive, but it is also time consuming. The time that you might be spending hanging out at the mall, or movies, or other places will be spent in practice. This limits the time that you have for boys. The fact that you play an all girls sport limits the amount of time that you are going to have for guys. I am not saying that you cannot have both sports and boys, but what I am saying is give yourself a break your time is limited. You are a busy girl between school and sports. Relationships take time to initiate and to grow.

Most of the time, the best relationships come when you least expect it. So….if you want a guy, you are probably going to have to meet him at lunch, or in class. I wouldn’t rush this. You have plenty of time for guys. Stop driving yourself crazy. Be patient, when you have the time you will attract the guy.

I Hope This Helps!

 Chauntel

www.askchauntel.com

askchauntel@gmail.com