What Do Men Really Want – Christian Relationship Advice for Women

I share Christian Relationship Tips in this video on how to make a man miss you! If you want to set relationship goals to make him miss you this is an relationship advice video will be of great assistance! I hope you enjoy these relationship tips and share them with others!

Proverbs 21:19 It is better to live in a desert land than with a quarrelsome and fretful woman. 

If you are looking for life coaching, relationship or marriage help, I offer private coaching by email or even one-on-one coaching sessions. Here is more info:

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Happy Relationships : 3 Guidelines Women Should Follow in Relationships

DON’T DO: The Nag Instead of the Brag

Men don’t respond well to nagging. I mean who does? The best way to get the most out of your man is praise him for what he does right, and request the things that you need at the right time.

If you follow these two simple guidelines you will get the most out of your man more often. If you really want something done, you should not only consider asking, but ask when he is available to actually get the task done and is not preoccupied with another responsibility.

If you want your man to respond positively to you, brag on him. In fact, let him hear you do it! This makes him feel loved and proud to do more for you.

DONT’: Let Your Emotions Lead

Women were born with instincts that favor emotion over logic. Many times it is hard to not allow your emotions to affect your actions. However, to build a strong relationship you must remember not to allow your emotions to be the sole determinant of actions that you take.

Emotions do exist for a reason, and they play an important role in relationships. However, it is important to remember that they should not dictate you actions. Instead, weigh logic and emotion when choosing to make decisions.

DON’T: Find Self Worth in Him

Verse I Would Like to Share: Psalms 139:14

Remember that you are uniquely made by God. Therefore, instead of finding your worth in your relationship find your worth in God.

If you have no life outside of your relationship you will find it difficult to be happy within your relationship. This doesn’t mean that you cannot do things with your bae, but it does mean that you should have other things that you are interested in doing on your own.

Simply, keep your girlfriends and have a hobby. There will be times where your guy wants to hang with his guy friends, and you should be ok with that. He will be more excited to get home to you if you don’t make a fuss about it. Remember to make your life equally as interesting as he thinks his is!

Email me questions to: askchauntel@gmail.com

Interracial Dating: How to Approach Black Women

Daniel writes:

Hey Chauntel,

I’m nervous about talking to black girls any suggestions?

Hi Daniel,

Screen Shot 2016-04-11 at 2.48.16 PM
“Cookie” from the show “Empire”

So there is this massive media portrayal of black women being, for lack of a better word, “difficult” to approach or get a long with in a relationship. This is really a huge misconception.

I believe in many ways we are being misrepresented. We maybe bold, and we may seem intimidating at first, for whatever the reason, but we are truly very light hearted. When we love we love hard. We treat our men like kings.

More and more black women are reaching outside of their race.

Bellow are some celebrity couples that you may be familiar with. For purposes of this post, we won’t get into the specifics of their relationships.However, for your knowledge some are currently: married, divorced, broken-up, dating. You get the picture! Either way they have been coupled up at one time or another! Take the poll below to vote on your favorite!

 

To answer your question specifically, approach with confidence. If you don’t have it, “fake it til’ you make it!” There isn’t anything spectacularly different about approaching a black women than approaching any other women!  Just be yourself, and be confident in what you have to offer.

With all that being said, make sure that you have something to offer. Which might mean, scaling back to work on building yourself up before approaching a woman.

Oh, and here is a recent video that I produced:

Titled: Do Black Women Like White Men?

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel

email questions to: askchauntel@gmail.com

Which was your favorite black woman and white man celebrity couple? Take the poll! Give comments and advice:

 

How to Have Succesful Marriage – Ask Chauntel

I’m back and ready to share some useful tips for you!

Mommy Monday- 4 Week Postpartum and Baby Update

I am so excited to share our small milestones for this week! Enjoy! Subscribe and stay connected!

Kendra Chooses to Stay With Hank Baskett After He Cheated- Should You Stay Married After Infidelity?

Screen Shot 2014-12-10 at 12.46.09 PMKendra Baskett has been thrust into the spotlight since her time in the Playboy Mansion. The reality star and model starred in the E! reality television series Girls Next Door. This series documented her life as one of Hugh Hefner’s girlfriends. She now headlines her own reality series Kendra on Top. With all of this time in the lime light Kendra has shared intimate moments of her life with a broad audience. Her husband Hank, of six years, allegedly cheated on her with a transexual model, Ava London. Hank was very remorseful and went into a deep depression surrounding the time of his affair, he shares with US Weekly. “For the past two years, I’ve gone through a serious struggle with depression, and during that time I lost the ability to open up toScreen Shot 2014-12-10 at 12.49.50 PM my best friend, Kendra,” Hank told Us Weekly. “I had trouble thinking of the right thing to say the right way, especially in a situation like this, where it’s your word against someone else’s.” When the story about her perfect marriage, looking to be in shambles, broke Kendra found it difficult to deal with all of the pressure of media. However, she handled it gracefully. During, her exclusive interview with Access Hollywood Kendra defended her marriage. Then, in a later interview with Giuliana Rancic, Kendra stated: “I cannot shut this man down. I’m willing to spend the rest of my life trying to figure this out rather than spend one night single.” Whether or not you agree with Kendra’s decision, you must believe that it took a lot of strength for her to stand up against the media’s chastising of her decision to stay with Hank. Do you agree with Kendra’s decision, vote below? My Opinion: I feel that Kendra made this decision based on what was best for her. It’s easy to point fingers and say what she should do, but its her marriage and her life. Unless, you can live it for her, let her make her own decision and don’t ridicule her for it! We can all take time to judge what Hank has done, and most would tell her to leave him. However, we do not have all the facts, and we are not in their relationship. If their love is strong enough to survive, then let it go on! But Kendra, if these patterns with Hank continue get-out-of-dodge!

First French Kiss Advice

Anna writes:

Hi Chauntel,

I have a boyfriend, and we have already kissed.  But now i think we will French Kiss. I really want to but don’t know how. I am really nervous and scared.

Please write me back if you can.
Big fan of yours. Love Anna
Hi Anna,
Thanks so much for your question. You made a very important statement, that you really want to. I want to make sure that, that is absolutely true because you should not be forced or encouraged into doing anything that makes you feel uncomfortable.
Screen Shot 2014-11-07 at 10.58.53 AMNow, I am not a kissing expert, haha. However, what I can tell you is that this is something that you learn in the moment. Just follow his lead, go with the flow. You will quickly learn.
Most importantly take it slow. There is nothing attractive about a forceful tongue, when force is not wanted or needed. So, don’t rush it just let it happen slowly. You will get the hang of it.
Remember, to protect yourself. His hands should stay around your waist, not above or below. If he tries any funny business. Politely move his hands back to where they should be. He will get the message. If not, there is something wrong with that picture.
Thanks for your support!
I Hope This Helps!
Chauntel
email questions to askchauntel@gmail.com Tweet/Insta @askchauntel

How to Ask a Girl Out – Without Creeping Her Out!

16-year-old Luis from Houston Texas writes:

Hi Chauntel,

I love the show, and you give great advice. Even from both perspectives, but I just kind of need advice.

Every time I talk to girls they seem to be creeped out, like they’ll walk away slowly, give one answer response. When I approach girls I usually give a compliment or talk about the surroundings. For example i was talking to this girl and she was being weird about it. So I asked “why are you walking like I’m creeping you out?” And she said “cause you are” I’ll give them a compliment, and that’s when things go wrong.. Maybe I’m coming off too strong? Any advice to do when I’m this situation again. I want her to feel comfortable. It be amazing if you can help me. Thank you, take care.

by photostock
by photostock

Hi Luis,

Thanks so much for your kind words! I am so glad that you enjoy the show! I decided to go ahead and share your question on my blog here. I also have a few videos that I have created related to this subject. I am not sure if you have seen them, but I will leave them below. Hopefully, you will find them helpful.

So, here is where I think the problem lies. When you approach a girl, small talk is ok, which it seems like you are doing. However, there also seems to be an awkwardness associated with your encounters.

You want to involve her in the conversation, and get her interested in what you are saying. Randomly giving her compliments is making her feel uncomfortable.

So for example the conversation could go something like:

Luis: “Wow isn’t today a beautiful day?”

Girl: “Yea, its really pretty today.”

Luis: “It it is made even more beautiful by your smile. My name is Luis. What is your name?”

(Luis reaches out hand out to shake Sarah’s hand.)

Girl: “Hi Luis, my name is Sarah.”

Luis: “Oh it is so nice to meet you Sarah.”

Sarah: “It’s nice to meet you too Luis.”

Luis: “So what does a beautiful girl like you have planned for this beautiful day?”

Sarah: “Oh thank you. Actually I am here to…….”

Luis: Responds to what Sarah has planning for the day

Screen Shot 2014-11-04 at 10.55.29 AMSo, here you have introduced yourself nicely and given her a compliment. You also have gotten her involved in the conversation without creeping her out. Now this last conversation piece is key.

After you complete your small talk conversation, its time to seal the deal!

Let Sarah know that you have enjoyed your conversation, and you would like to talk to her more later. Then ask her for her phone number so you can “text her later”. If she doesn’t want to give you that ask her for her Facebook or Instagram. If she isn’t interested you will know because she will politely decline.

Not every girl will be interested in you. However, if you keep these things in mind and make her feel apart of the conversation it will help. Don’t drop random compliments it will make her feel uncomfortable.

Also, be careful what you are complimenting her about. Keep it simple, like telling her she is beautiful, or saying something nice about her smile or her eyes. Also, don’t let your eyes wonder all over her body when you are talking to her. Keep it at about eye level. Be calm and relax. If you are nervous, she will probably be able to tell, and it will make her more uncomfortable.

Women like men who are confident within themselves. See yourself as the cool guy. If you want her to believe it, you have to believe it first!

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel

email questions to askchauntel@gmail.com Tweet/Insta @askchauntel

Ariana Grande Wants Bigger Boobs – Don’t Change Yourself for Anyone

Screen Shot 2014-10-24 at 9.51.46 AMHello Jewels and Gems!

I was hoping that sweet Ariana Grande would stay out of the media for such stories, but Hollywood has a way of making our young stars grow up so fast!

21-year-old singer Ariana has been dating Big Sean, and rumor has it that he has her considering life altering changes that will showcase “a little more of her”.

Oh, Ariana, don’t do it for the guy! He could be here today and gone tomorrow. Plus, why would you want to be with  a man who makes you insecure about your own body? He should love and embrace you for who you are.

Getting breast implants is a lifetime commitment. So Jewels if you ever choose to go get some done. Make sure it is for you, if you do it for a man, you might find yourself resenting him one day. Also look into the risks and maintenance of them.

Share a Story or Ask a Question @askchauntel & askchauntel@gmail.com

Does Size Matter?

Go Eww writes:
Hey Chauntel,
You give great advice and your point of view is different in a good way , at least to me it is. My question is very different I’m sure but w/e.
I’ve been seeing this beautiful girl she’s black and I’m half black myself, and our chemistry is perfect,everyone seems to think I’m really good looking and she tells me all the time.
I know she wants to get in bed with me for a fact the only reason it hasn’t happened yet is because I’m 6.5 inches long and I really wanted your opinion on this.
Like am I enough to leave her pleased, like i said very,but could you please write back to me, and understand I don’t mean to rude or gross at all.
I need to get rid of these nervous butterflies, I appreciate it thanks.

Hi Go Eww,

Thanks for your email, and for your kind words.
Screen Shot 2014-10-24 at 8.38.36 AMHere is my opinion, if you have watched enough of my videos you would know that although, I do my best to take a unbiased stance, my advice is given from my perspective.
With that in mind, you should also know that I am Christian. I believe that sex should be saved for marriage.
Moreover, to answer your question specifically, if you go into a physical relationship with her before there are real feelings there, it will be more of a physical expectation that she will have for you.
Meaning, if she considers your size too small for her it will be more of an issue if you go into a physical relationship too soon. If time passes, and you build feelings for each other your specific physical attributes will be less of a focus. Now, don’t get me wrong they will still have an impact, but it won’t be the only thing she has to base her decision on, on whether or not she wants to continue a relationship together.
Therefore, I recommend you wait to have sex, take it slow. If she really cares for you, she will accept you just the way God made you, just for who you are.
There is no need to be nervous, if its meant to be it will be. If she is not attracted to you it won’t work anyway. So, be confident in what you have and give the best version of yourself. That is all you can do.
If she doesn’t accept, well then on to the next! There will be another woman out there who will love every part of you and not want to change anything! You dig?
I Hope This Helps!
Chauntel
email questions to askchauntel@gmail.com