In this video I share how to get a guy to like you in college. Good Dating Advice for women in their 20s is hard to find these days. So I am so exited to share this video for those of you with the relationship goal to get a guy to like you.
If you are looking for life coaching, relationship or marriage help, I offer private coaching by email or even one-on-one coaching sessions. Here is more info:
If you are in a Christian Relationship, and you would like to learn how to get a guy to commit then this video is for you! If you want to learn how to transition your relationship into marriage then watch! Leave your thoughts below!
In this video I give Christian Relationship Advice on what you should do as a woman to make a man want you. I respond to a viewer comment from a video that I posted a few weeks ago on how to make a man miss you! It is so important to remember to be yourself in a relationship! You don’t have to change who you are to be loved or wanted!
Now, this doesn’t mean that you don’t have any real control over what is happening. You just put things into place so that he can take the leading role.
Why? Well, the way that God designed the roles, men are to be the ones leading, and we follow our men. So wait for him girl; let him approach you!
So here is the recipe that we have all been waiting for:
Catch his Attention
Remember, first impressions are very important when it comes to relationships. So make sure that you are at your best. This means physically and every other way. So, look good and smell good around him, and be the best version of yourself in general.
Don’t hide who you are, let your light shine bright girl! Be you, because if you present a false version of yourself he won’t be liking you. Instead, he will like a skeleton of you.
However, with this said, use your table manners and be a lady. If that’s not you, you might need to work on that!
Lay the foundation
Don’t get friend-zoned and position yourself as one of the guys. Flirt with him! Make sure that he sees you as a beautiful feminine women who he can imagine himself in a relationship with.
Be pleasant and somewhat mysterious in your dress and conversation. “Let your hair down” and be feminine so that he can be masculine. Don’t show off all of your goods! Being modest in apparel will help him to respect you! You can be classy and sexy, no need to be trashy! A little mystery goes a long way, he doesn’t need your whole life story from jump. Give him something to look forward to learning about you.
So, with that being said, don’t always be available, have somethings going on in your life. It keeps you interesting.
Establish Your Role
The key to getting a guy to like you is not only to attract him but you also have to have that “it” factor to keep him so that he will want to commit to you. If you do this right, you won’t have to ask or wonder what your role is.
You want him to feel like you are apart of his world, and without you his world isn’t complete. So how do you do this?
When you are in his world, be interested, be attentive, add to it. Don’t overstep boundaries or make him feel hovered. Don’t rush anything or scare him away.
If he wants you in his world he will put you in it. If he never does, then you know that this one just isn’t the right relationship for you.
You should never have to force position. If you force it now, just imagine how you will feel later.
I have a serious question about my partner. He’s a great person. Protective. A leader. Hard working and all the important stuff. We have been together 4 years and are getting married in 3 months. Since we have gotten engaged, his family has taken a turn for the worst!
-My partner and I were in escrow for a house. His mom called me over alone to pick up some necessary documents. She used the opportunity of us being alone to tell me off and disrespect me. She insulted me as a woman and adult. My fiancé told her she can’t talk to me like that but her behavior never really changed.
– The next time I was alone with his mom, she told me it is my duty as a woman to have sex with her son and wear lingerie for him. My sex life is none of her business, and he and I are not married yet. I know she doesn’t talk to her daughters that way. My boundaries of respect were violated.
-His father constantly insults (or back handed compliments) my family. He once told me I’m beautiful and it’s a shame my sisters are ugly. He also told me he hopes I don’t end up rude like mother. And once he said I look pregnant! (I am very fit and he knows I’m working hard for a wedding dress body. It was a calculated insult).
– My in-laws constantly would ask be about children before the wedding date was even set. This is an insult to me because I was raised to wait until marriage to have children and they know that. They raised their family in that way too. I don’t see them asking their daughters those kind of questions
-My partner’s oldest sister invited me to a night out to get to know me better and invited a girl she tried to set my man up with! It was hazing before he proposed a month later
– His family is drama. That same sister accused him of prioritizing me over his family. Like yes the Bible says he’s supposed to leave his family of origin to start a new life with me.
– I tried winning them over/impressing them by offering to cook Mother’s Day lunch. His mom constantly questioned my home making skills (in my culture, that is an insult to my womanhood). He and I both assured her it would be my pleasure to cook. She still cooked anyway and his sisters made it a point to taunt me that she cooked.
This is just some examples. There are so many instances of disrespect towards me as a future daughter in law. His family completely changed once he put a ring on it. I used to be cool with them and it all changed once we were engaged and bought a home. And I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to take him away from his family but I also cannot put up with this behavior until death do us part. I’m beginning to have second thoughts even about children. If they are over bearing and possessive of him now, imagine how they will behave when I have children?
I want a successful relationship with my man. But I don’t know what to do. He’s tried talking to them on my behalf. I stand up for self when they make comments about me. But they just don’t stop. My only idea is to no longer visit them or see them. But I know that will be hard on my partner. I can’t just grin and bear it. Their behavior has literally given me panic attacks (I panic in private)
How do I let go of my resentment towards his family in order to have a successful relationship with my future husband? Do you think our relationship stands any chance? How do I get his family to stop disrespecting me? I feel really hopeless. People divorce over in laws after all.
I should also note: He’s protective of them. When I had panic attacks, he thought I was being dramatic and overly critical of his family. I don’t want him to chose sides but I feel for the past 4 years, he has taken their side over mine in every instance. The recent Mother’s Day event, when his mother was insulting my cooking abilities (they all ended up loving the food by the way!!), he even asked, well why did u offer????
He’s getting a little better at standing up for me but I just don’t know what to. I feel really lost and down about it and hopeless about my relationship. The worst part is, I think this is what the want in the end. To break us up and have him all to themselves again. How can I forgive people who refuse to admit to what they do or even apologize?
He also supported them financially until he bought a house with me….
This is a very difficult situation that you are in, and I am so glad that you asked the question. Many women deal with difficult in laws, and I believe they can also learn from your situation. Just know that you are not alone in this.
First of all congrats on your wedding and finding a suitable groom to marry.
Here is the bottom line when it comes to his family, he has to be the one to fix it. He has to understand your perspective and defend your position with them. You cannot do this successfully for a number of reasons.
If you try to stand up against his family, in the way that he should stand up for you, you run a chance of him being upset with you. You may also say or do something that will sever your relationship with them for good. What we hope for is a possible positive future between you and your in laws. I believe that with some positive communication and time this is still possible.
It appears that your mother-in-law is pinning her family against you, and doing her best to get rid of you. I think you should hang in there as long as he is willing to stand up for you.
If he does not become understanding and sympathetic towards your position, then I think you will find it difficult to be in a marriage with him.
And yes, you are very wise, when children are added to the picture it will be even more difficult this is why he has to nip it in the bud now.
So, the only person who can fix this is him, and if he doesn’t do it now, you might have to consider if you want to go into a life long marriage with this type of animosity between you and your in-laws.
It is normal to have some resistance in these relationships, but not to the point where you are having panic attacks and dealing with all of this verbal abuse.
To your question of if you can just stay away from them, no, it seems that they are close and you don’t want to unlink him from his family completely that will make him unhappy and possibly give him resentment towards you.
As you mentioned, yes, the Bible does say, for the man to leave his mother and father and cleave to his wife in Matthew 19:5. That simply expresses that he has to be the one to get this situation under control.
If he is a man of God, and you are in a Christian Relationship then he should do this without a problem. If he is not, then you are about to face a more challenges.
I share Christian Relationship Tips in this video on how to make a man miss you! If you want to set relationship goals to make him miss you this is an relationship advice video will be of great assistance! I hope you enjoy these relationship tips and share them with others!
Proverbs 21:19 It is better to live in a desert land than with a quarrelsome and fretful woman.
If you are looking for life coaching, relationship or marriage help, I offer private coaching by email or even one-on-one coaching sessions. Here is more info:
Men don’t respond well to nagging. I mean who does? The best way to get the most out of your man is praise him for what he does right, and request the things that you need at the right time.
If you follow these two simple guidelines you will get the most out of your man more often. If you really want something done, you should not only consider asking, but ask when he is available to actually get the task done and is not preoccupied with another responsibility.
If you want your man to respond positively to you, brag on him. In fact, let him hear you do it! This makes him feel loved and proud to do more for you.
DONT’: Let Your Emotions Lead
Women were born with instincts that favor emotion over logic. Many times it is hard to not allow your emotions to affect your actions. However, to build a strong relationship you must remember not to allow your emotions to be the sole determinant of actions that you take.
Emotions do exist for a reason, and they play an important role in relationships. However, it is important to remember that they should not dictate you actions. Instead, weigh logic and emotion when choosing to make decisions.
DON’T: Find Self Worth in Him
Verse I Would Like to Share: Psalms 139:14
Remember that you are uniquely made by God. Therefore, instead of finding your worth in your relationship find your worth in God.
If you have no life outside of your relationship you will find it difficult to be happy within your relationship. This doesn’t mean that you cannot do things with your bae, but it does mean that you should have other things that you are interested in doing on your own.
Simply, keep your girlfriends and have a hobby. There will be times where your guy wants to hang with his guy friends, and you should be ok with that. He will be more excited to get home to you if you don’t make a fuss about it. Remember to make your life equally as interesting as he thinks his is!
In this video I am speaking to my church family at a young adult service explaining how to live the life that God has planned for you! We all have a purpose and to live a purpose driven life you must seek him. I explain how this work and share scripture with you! I hope you find it helpful! Please rate, comment and subscribe!
I love your videos I wish I was as confident as you are!
I recently have a boyfriend of 4 months who’s 26 and who I deeply love and care about.
We have never been too intimate, we never had our clothes off or touched each other let alone have sex. We’ve been only kissing and hugging.
The reason we never did this is because I’m a very insecure girl when it comes to my body. I’m natural skinny, have small boobs and a small a**. On top of that my boobs are asymmetric uneven which makes me more insecure.
My insecurity came from my ex verbally abusive boyfriend who would always say something negative about my body.
He would say things like “you have some chicken arms and legs” – “you have no booty” – “you should eat more”. He always say that he’s just joking and that I should know that he’s only ‘joking’.
But it’s not just my ex boyfriend who used to say that, my family too.
They always used to tease me like “you’re skinny cause you don’t eat a lot” – “you’re like a walking stick” – “people can break you in 2”.
It really really hurts my feelings say those things to me. I can’t do anything about how God made me 😦 If I could I would. Whatever I eat I just don’t gain weight. So that really damaged my self esteem and made me more self conscious.
I became so self conscious to the point where I used to put, hip and breast pads to create some curves so I can feel better and look more ‘attractive’.
I met my current boyfriend while I was wearing those pads. I always remove his hands when he gets near those places cause in afraid he might feel something strange. I’m afraid to get intimate with him and put my pads off he will see that I don’t have those curves and might like me less or even worse leave me.
I created something that I’m not, and now it’s getting in between me and the guy that I love.
So far he’s been really patient and he’s a very understanding guy but at some point he’ll lose his patience cause he got needs as well and would want to get intimate with me. Always talk about it, but I always try to avoid that subject he asks me why I won’t be intimate.
My question for you is:
How can I get pass this? Do I tell him about the pads or not?
And How do I become more confident about my body?
If you would help I would really appreciate that!!!!
Love you girl!
Wow there is so much to address here! I want to start off by saying thanks so much for your kind words. I am so glad that you have been enjoying my videos! It means so much!
So let’s take your question piece by piece, ok?
I am so glad that you have been able to find a guy that you are into that is also into you! That is so fun, right? I would just like to point out that, although the physical part is important to address, intimacy goes beyond just the physical. However, I do understand that you are in a situation where you feel that he is looking to get more physical. This is just as much your decision as it is his, so be sure that you are not rushing into or forcing it before it is time.
In my eyes its not such a bad thing that you have only been hugging and kissing! From my videos, I am sure that you know that I am Christian and believe in abstinence. So, my hope is that you will save yourself for marriage. Ultimately, this is your decision, but I want point out that based on your beliefs, values, and emotions, you must decide if and when you’re ready to go all the way with him.
Now, let’s talk about you being insecure about your body. We all have something about our body that we dislike and wish to mask. Some people even go as far as to change themselves through surgeries, but I am with you sista, God made us just as we are and we should embrace ourselves as such.
The only reason that we feel insecure about ourselves is because we find ourselves comparing ourselves to others. No good can come from that because we were all made completely differently.
As far as this ex-boyfriend of yours. He is scum. I am glad you were able to recognize the fact that he left you emotionally scarred. Knowing that alone will help you begin the healing process. Many times when people begin to tear us down, its because of their own insecurities. However, words hurt, but what you have to do is release those negative thoughts that he put into your head about yourself so that you can move forward with your life. Don’t give him this kind of power over you and allow it to effect your self worth. You have to let him and everything that came with him go. There is no need for you to carry around that emotional baggage that he has given you. Leave it for him to pick up.
No matter what he or your family has said about you. God made you to be just who you are and no one should dare try to challenge that. Who are they to question God’s creation. Sometimes, the people closest to us can be the most critical. The crucial part about it is their words can have the most impact. Why? Because they are close to our hearts and their words are just that much closer to tugging and tearing down our heart strings.
However, you have the power to overcome their horrible words and the pain that they have given you.
I would like to share a verse with you: Psalms 139:14
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”
There is also a song that I will leave in the end of this post, called “Overcomer” it is powerful and uplifting! Once you let go of everyone’s horrible words and stop carrying around their pain with you, you will begin to breathe better. Then, I need you to stop comparing yourself to everyone else. Once you accept the fact that you were wonderfully made by God, and he loves you just the way you are you will begin to build confidence in your body. Do not compare yourself to other people because you will always be disappointed. Why? Because we are not the same and there is a true beauty in that right?
Yes, you should absolutely share the truth with your guy. If he really cares about you, although he may be shocked that will not run him away. However, if he is only with you for your body then he may not respond so well, but guess what if that is the case you don’t want him anyway.
You are absolutely going to be ok. Just prepare yourself mentally for the conversation because you do not know how he is going to react. Give him some time though, be patient with him. He may be upset with you initially, because essentially you have been lying to him non-verbally.
So be patient with him, and share this information because until you do your relationship cannot move forward!
I Hope This Helps, and I love you to girl! I also want to share with you a radio podcast that I recorded last summer. The title of the show is “Is Body Image Mental or Physical?”