Tag: love

Being Bullied and Insecure About Myself

Published on by Chauntel DelgadoLeave a comment

14-year-old Nancy writes:

Hi Chauntel!

So I’m watching your videos right now and I thought it is a good idea to write an email to you.
It’s not going to be an email about boys or something like that. It’s about me and my self-esteem.
When I look at the mirror I don’t see anything bad. But people in my school are bully me because
of my large and bulging (REALLY bulging) eyes. I’m only 14 and I can’t deal with it. What should I do?
Hi Nancy,
It’s funny that it’s your eyes that you point out because I have just the opposite problem. My eyes are so small. When I smile they almost completely go away. In fact when I was a baby my family asked my mom if she was sure that she had taken home the right baby because they thought I looked Chinese.
The reality is, we all have something about ourselves that Make us stand out. However, God made us just the way we are for a specific purpose. Lucky for me I was able to see your picture when you wrote in. What the kids at school don’t know or quite understand is that your beauty is in your eyes.
After reading your question I took a look at your photo, and let me tell you those eyes of yours could take you far in modeling. I am not sure how tall you are, but if you are at leastt 5’9″ you should really consider high fashion modeling. Here is an excellent resource that I found: http:http://www.exploremodeling.com/ If you are not that tall, not to worry they’re are other areas of modeling. However, don’t go into that unless you develop thick skin. I just wanted to mention this to you as an option because I think you’re beautiful and you should give it a try.
Now to address your question specifically, what do you do? You take what they say with a grain of salt. Kids at school are always gonna find something mean to say about each other. It was like that for me, and it is going to be like that for you. If you embrace your beautiful eyes they will eventually leave you alone about it. The only reason they continue to tease you is they know that they are getting to you. If you truly begin to love your eyes, and let what they say role off your sleeve they will notice your confidence and hopefully buzz off.
I was never good with coming up with ways to talk back to people so I would just ignore them or walk away. I know it really hurts. but this is only for a season. It gets better, and once your modeling they will make fun of you because of their jealousy.
So what’s the moral of the story here? People talk, ignore them. You choose your destiny not them. You have the power to wake up every morning and love what you see in the mirror.
By the way here are some successful models with eyes like yours (:
Google both of them. You will see how much of a splash they have made in history, past and present.

How to Approach a Girl : Re SimplePickup

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Chauntel expresses a women’s perspective on how men should approach a girl. She points out the points made in simplepickup’s video and adds her two sense! Watch!

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My Girlfriend Has Too Many Guyfriends

Published on by Chauntel Delgado1 Comment

21-year-old Ryan from Massachusetts writes:

Hi Chauntel!,

How are you? I had a few relationship questions.

1. I’ve been in a relationship with my girlfriend for about 2 months and everything is great. She is on the field hockey team at school and hangs out with a lot of kids on other sports teams. She says she’d never cheat, and alot of the baseball kids are her best friends…..is there a way I can handle this because honestly i’ve never dated a girl with so many good guy friends.

2. She isn’t very romantic and I am, is there a way to coax her into being more romantic or do I give her space and let her come to me?

3. Since this is all new and my last relationship was of 3 years, what advice to you have to keeping relationships fun, healthy and happy.

Hi Ryan,

I love your questions, and I will address them one at a time just as you have asked them.

1. If your girlfriend is in an environment with a lot of guys, that is ok. You have to have confidence within yourself and your relationship. The two of you just need to sit down and develop boundaries on what is appropriate within your relationship when comes to hangouts with the opposite sex. Once you two have agreed on what is appropriate you have to trust her. I know it is a hard thing to do, but you have to do it for the sake of your relationship. When and if those boundaries are crossed then that is when you actually have a problem, but for the time being don’t make it an issue. It is not.

2. In most relationships one person is usually more romantic than the other. That is ok. It works out better that way because one person balances the other out. Now, the problem is when she is not willing to be romantic with you, but if she is in the moment with you and enjoying it, stop complaining. It is ok that you are the initiator. In fact, that is even better because you are the guy. But again, this is not a problem so don’t make it one.

3. Wow, you’re third question is a loaded one. I could probably write a book on it, but we will do what we can here. To keep a relationship fun, healthy and fresh you have to include excitement in what you do. Celebrate the little things. Compliment each other often. Always be in tune to what the other person is feeling. Don’t just listen to what they say, but watch their body language. Stay in tune with their emotions. Never, get into such a routine that you never do anything spontaneous. Think out of the box and find little ways to surprise each other. Communication is the key ingredient to this. If you have good communication and stay in tune with your mates emotions you will have the best chance at a healthy, fun, and happy relationship.

I also have an article that I wrote entitled: 10 Ways To Build a New Successful Relationship

Email questions to askchauntel@gmail.com

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I Don’t Know How to Be Friends With My Ex

Published on by Chauntel Delgado1 Comment

24-year-old John from Dallas writes:

Hi  Chauntel,

I broke up with my ex in February because i wanted to finish my associate degree (which i did) and work full time to save for a car (in which i dont have yet). We’ve been great friends since. We still talk great. No sex involved. Some days I want it back. Some days i only want general sex with women i DONT care for. How do I know if we should try it again? Or if I need to be single?

Follow-up Question from Chauntel to John:

Hi John,

Those days that you “want it back” what is it that you are missing or wanting?
Those days that you “don’t care for her,” why is that?
Reply from John:

I want back the fact that I only need to worry about her and not making a handful of women happy.

On single days I like to flirt and know that if I had sex with a girl, another wouldn’t get offended. There would be no commitment.

Image
by by artur84

Chauntel’s Response:

Hi John,

I think it is great that you and your ex have remained friends, that is so important. However, I am not convinced that you are ready to be in a relationship.

I think it is comfortable for you to be with her, and that is why “some days” you like it. You are not that into her. It is nice that you are worried about her, but you cannot feel guilted into a relationship with her. That is not fair to either of you. She will end up being hurt in the long run if you continue to walk the line. Don’t send her mixed signals. If you guys are friends, then don’t make her feel like it is more. That is torture.

I also think you are just fearful of moving on.

Don’t mess up your friendship with her, unless you are sure that you actually want to pursue a relationship with her. If you do, both of you will end up hurt.

You are in the mood to play the field, and that’s ok. The only time that becomes a problem is if you put yourself in a committed relationship. Don’t do it.

I know that you enjoy the comfort of a girl to come home to, but you cannot have that and play the field. You have to choose one or the other. I would not advise you to jump back into a relationship with her. Give yourself sometime. You are obviously searching for something that you did not find in that relationship. Continue to respect her.

Don’t “accidently” have sex with her one-night and say it just happened, because guess what it will mean much more to her than it just being an accident. You seem like a nice guy so don’t force this.

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel

Email questions to: askchauntel@gmail.com

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9 Things a Girl Should Never Say to Her Boyfriend!

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10 is laugh at him! Chauntel gives women advice on 9 things they should never say to their boyfriend. Funny! Watch! askchauntel@gmail.com http://www.askchauntel.com

Free Weekly Newsletter

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Hey Guys!

Did you know that I have a Free Weekly AC Newsletter just for you that comes out every Friday.

It includes a poll, the radio show topic for the proceeding week, as well as all of the video and blog posts from that week!

Become apart of our community, by subscribing to the free weekly newsletter! I am excited to have you on board!

Love Always,

Chauntel

To Subscribe click here.

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Ask Chauntel Radio Starts Next Thursday July 11 at 3pm

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Hey Beautiful People!

Ask Chauntel Radio is here! Ever wanted to talk to Chauntel directly, for free? Now is your chance, call into her radio show with your question every Thursday, beginning July 11, at 3:00pm PCT. She would love to speak to you! To listen in logon towww.blogtalkradio.com/askchauntel

This weeks topic is: How should a girl show that she is interested? Vote

Listen Live to Ask Chauntel Radio by clicking here.

Here is the number to call in for Ask Chauntel Radio Next Thursday, July 11 at 3pm: (646) 929-1389
Here is where you logon: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/askchauntel/2013/07/25/dating-and-relationship-advice-from-ask-chauntel 

 

Weekly Ask Chauntel Poll: How should a girl show that she is interested?

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New Poll Every Friday!

What to Wear on a First Date – Fashion Advice – Ask Chauntel

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Chauntel shares tips on what you should think about when selecting your outfit for a first date. What should you wear for what occasion. What should you consider? Watch!
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The Law of Attraction

Published on by Chauntel Delgado1 Comment

14-year-old Nick writes:

Hey Chauntel, I just watched your video on how to approach a girl and stuff like that…. But my situation is a little bit tougher.. I’m 14, I just started high school this year and I noticed this girl kind of right off the bat as soon as I saw her she immediately drew my attention but I cannot get enough courage to talk to her everytime I try I get all nervous start to blush I get butterflies my mind goes all crazy so I back out and just not talk to her. I’ve never talked to this girl before bc of that reason and it’s almost the end of the school year and I’ve never said a word to her. What’s your advice on how to approach her for the first time without making me look like a fool and I can give her a good first impression on how I am?? And I guess I’m kind of pessimistic about this situation bc I doubt my chances of ever being able to date her when the time presents itself and I always think I’m not good enough and my looks aren’t good enough and I don’t wanna wait too long bc she could get swept up by another guy and I don’t want that /: so please if you could answer back with some advice on this situation ASAP it would help me soooo much (: hope to hear back soon!

Hi Nick,

Have you heard of the Law of Attraction? The gist of it is, if you think negatively you will attract negativity. So, if you keep thinking that you have a small chance to attract her, guess what you do.

So what I need you to do is stop thinking of yourself as never getting a chance with her, but start believing that she would be happy to have you.

If you step to a girl without confidence she is not going to take you seriously, and she will not be attracted to you. Also, this is not about putting on a show. All you have to do is be yourself.

As far as your looks go, although I am not sure how you look I want you to know in most cases it really doesn’t matter. I mean face it. Haven’t you seen plenty of beautiful girls with not so hot guys. Do you know why? It is because those girls are attracted to those guys based on that guys confidence. This is not to say that you are not attractive ok.

So moving on. What you need is a game plan. I don’t mean that you need to memorize how the conversation is going to go word for word. If you do that and it doesn’t go the way you planned you will choke.

Here is how you approach her: Walk up to her and say hello. Introduce yourself. Let her introduce herself. Then, give her a compliment. Then have small talk. It could be about anything.

Then create a sense of urgency. Make up an excuse as to why you have to go, or simply tell her that you have enjoyed talking to her, and you would like to get to know her better. This is the time that you ask her for her number. Then you tell her you will talk to her later, and off you go. Whatever you do, stop this negative self talk and believe in yourself. You will be glad you did.

Now, once you have done that you have approached her, and you have left a good thought in her mind of you. Need some help with the next conversation? I have a video for that:

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel