Tag: help

Interracial Dating Help Please!

Published on by Chauntel Delgado1 Comment

19-year-old CJ writes:

Hi there Chauntel!

I just wanted to ask you about my situation. Well here’s the situation. This girl that works at the same place I work at (Walmart) is whom I really like. Shes black. Now I’m Filipino and shes Jamaican. Just saying lol

Someone in my department had told her that I like her and I heard that she smiled about it. So what does that mean? Is that a sign that she likes me as well? Or just so that shes flattered and plus she’s 22 and I’m 19 turning 20.

Hi CJ,

Well, a smile is universal for happy. Beyond that, there is not much else we can know for sure.
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What I recommend is you approach her, and ask her out for ice cream. See if she is interested. Schedule the time a little after lunch, but before dinner. If Ice cream goes well you can take a walk in the park right after, or schedule time to meet up again. The next meet up time will be for a more formal date like dinner, and an activity like: bowling, miniature golf, hiking, or something else that is interactive and will give you all the opportunity to talk. Save the movie for the second or third date, you cannot talk much at a movie.

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel

askchauntel@gmail.com

http://www.askchauntel

Should I Date My Friend? – Ask Chauntel

Published on by Chauntel DelgadoLeave a comment

Ginny writes:

Hey Chauntel,

I asked u a question a few months ago and you gave me a great answer.  I was wondering if you could give me advice on another issue?

I use to have a crush on one of my friends ( haha but all the girls did at the time). We really got close this year and I really opened up to him. He really help me sort things out with my life and he’s always there ready to help with what ever. I started to except that we would just be best friends cause he never gave any indication to wanting more. While we were texting yesterday I asked who he liked and he said “guess”. I didn’t want to guess me cause I was afraid of rejection. so I kinda acted like I didn’t know what he was talking about. He said “the friend ” he liked that he thought God was pointing him to her and he thought that God made them get so close so he could see the similarities.

Me and him are soo similar. I’ve never had that kind of connection with ANYONE. Im just so confused bc we’ve been so close and I don’t want to try and lose my best friend but at the same time I’ve never been so compatible with anyone like I have with him. In a way I think of think its the right thing to do and I feel like god made our paths cross for a reason.  Can you give me any advice?  I’d really appreciate it. I don’t know what to do.

Hi Ginny,

God truly has a way of working in our lives. I truly believe the scripture that says, “All things work together for them that love the Lord,” found in Romans 8:28. If you continue to let God guide you he will take you exactly where you want to go in life. So continue to live in his will.

As for the guy, I think it is great that the two of you have built a friendship. In order for your relationship to grow you need a solid foundation in friendship. Since you have that you are already at a great start.

Here is my two sense. If you like him and he likes you, love is worth the risk. Please keep in mind that if you date your friend the dynamics of your relationship will change. The good news is, if it doesn’t work out  you two will still have a good chance at being friends because you have built a solid foundation in your friendship!

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel

askchauntel@gmail.com

http://www.askchauntel.com

How To Attract a Guy When You are an Athlete

Published on by Chauntel DelgadoLeave a comment

15-year-old Brooklyn from Canada writes:

Hey Chauntel,

I play numerous sports, get good grades, and am outgoing! But yet I still can’t attract a guy, my bestfriend has guys all over her and yet I can’t even interest one. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, help!

Hi Brook!

I am so glad that you are in sports! That is awesome both for your health and for your future. It is helpful for your health because you are getting great exercise! It is helpful for your future because if you keep working hard you may eventually get a scholarship. Also, it is good to involve yourself with an extracurricular activity as it keeps you busy and away from trouble.

As far as the guys go, they love athletic girls, but that should not be your reason for being an athlete. You should be an athlete because you love it, not because you hope to attract a guy. However, being an athelete will put you in the “cool” category in school most of the time, and it will make you more appealing to guys.

 Here is one thing that I want you to keep in mind, you should not be comparing yourself to your bestfriend. Sure it is easy to do that because she is your age, and you are around her all the time. But…you have to consider that fact that you are your own person. The fact that you are bestfriends must mean that you compliment eachother and are probably different in many ways. With that said, you should not worry about the guys that she is attracting. If you want a guy, they you have to create the opportunities for you to meet and be around them.

Now, granted being an athelete is attractive, but it is also time consuming. The time that you might be spending hanging out at the mall, or movies, or other places will be spent in practice. This limits the time that you have for boys. The fact that you play an all girls sport limits the amount of time that you are going to have for guys. I am not saying that you cannot have both sports and boys, but what I am saying is give yourself a break your time is limited. You are a busy girl between school and sports. Relationships take time to initiate and to grow.

Most of the time, the best relationships come when you least expect it. So….if you want a guy, you are probably going to have to meet him at lunch, or in class. I wouldn’t rush this. You have plenty of time for guys. Stop driving yourself crazy. Be patient, when you have the time you will attract the guy.

I Hope This Helps!

 Chauntel

www.askchauntel.com

askchauntel@gmail.com

How do I Focus on One Woman- Dating Advice- Ask Chauntel

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Chauntel gives advice on how to focus your attention to one lady! Watch! askchauntel@gmail.com. This is part 1…… Part 2 Here is your response Korsa it is on my blog! http://askchauntel.blogspot.com/2012

Should I Tell My Crush I Like Him on Facebook?

Published on by Chauntel Delgado2 Comments

Brooke writes: 

Hello Chauntel,

 I’m a sophmore in high school and I like this boy who’s a senior. I always see him when he comes from his fourth period class to go to his fifth period class and we walk right past each other to get to our fifth period class. I recently added him on facebook and I was going to send him a msg letting him know that I like him but I rather do it in person.. How should I go up to him and let him know that im interested? I’m just hoping that he’s interested and single too.

photo courtesy of Marcus

Hi Brooke,

Do not send this to him on Facebook. If he doesn’t like you he could later use this against you. Case in point, let’s just say this guy isn’t the nicest and he decides to show your heartfelt message to his friends, that would be hurtful right?

Good for you that you had the courage to add him on Facebook. Sure, you can send him a message saying hello and beginning a conversation, but not about you liking him. Wouldn’t that be weird? The two of you don’t even know each other yet.  

If anything you should talk to him in person. Maybe set up a time to study with him for the class that the two of you have together. Maybe invite him out with friends. If he says no, no skin off your back, and if he says yes, well good for you gal!

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel

askchauntel@gmail.com

Why am I still single?

Published on by Chauntel Delgado1 Comment

Chauntel explains 7 reasons why you have not found your mate. What are you doing wrong? Watch! askchauntel@gmail.com

How to Talk to Beautiful Women When You are Nervous or Shy – Dating Advice – Ask Chauntel

Published on by Chauntel Delgado1 Comment

Chauntel explains why guys that fear talking to women struggle to connect with a girl. What must you do to get her attention? Where are you going wrong? There is an answer! Watch! askchauntel@gmail.com. How to To Talk to Women- Conversation Topics http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KGXDUe

How to get over your first love? – Relationship Advice – Ask Chauntel

Published on by Chauntel Delgado1 Comment

Chauntel gives advice on how to get over your ex. What do you need to do to get through the pain of loosing the one you love? Watch! askchauntel@gmail.com

Should I date a 17 year old guy when I am 13?

Published on by Chauntel Delgado3 Comments

13-year-old MJ from California writes:

Dear Chauntel,

There’s this guy that I met but he’s 17 and I’m only 13 he wants to go out but idk if I should because of the age difference. We are always texting 24/7 and he says he doesn’t care about the age difference. I’m not all that new at dating so idk if I should say yes I really do want to he’s really sweet and nice. But also he lives 4 hours away he usually comes on the weekends and we hang out but never alone. When I’m with him I feel like I’m his gf he’s always flirting with me and he’s always saying sweet things..he’s my friends “cousin”..and one of my best friends ….should I date him or not?
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Hi MJ,
I understand your hesitation. This guy is too old for you, and it’s not as much the age difference as it is the maturity level.
Older guys can more easily take advantage of you. I am sure that you are mature in many areas, but when it comes to dating I would like to see you gain some more  more years before you begin dating a guy that is four years older than you. I am sure that he has had much more experience with girls than you have with guys. He will therefore begin to introduce you to things that you may not be ready to encounter yet.
It would be better to find someone who is your age, and who you are able to grow with. The fact that he lives so far is also going to limit your ability to date. I honestly don’t think this is a good idea. You can be friends, but being anything more than that at this point is not a good idea.
If you are completely for this you need to get permission from your parents, but you will be setting yourself up for heartache. Soon he will be 18 and out of high school, and who knows what will happen then. Just save yourself the heartache on this one and date someone closer to your age.
I Hope This Helps!
Chauntel
askchauntel@gmail.com

How to Get Over Your Ex – Relationship Advice – Ask Chauntel

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Chauntel gives advice on how you can get yourself out of a slum after a long relationship and you feel like you’ve lost yourself. askchauntel@gmail.com