How to Dress For A First Date

Lala writes Hi Chauntel, I am wondering if you can help me with this. I am considered the “emo” girl I don’t mind that but labels are for soup cans. I am going on my first date soon and I would like some help with the look. Fashion Girl Vector Illustration

Hi Lala,

Yes, people are always going to place a label on you no matter who you are or what you do. They will always find something bad to say. They did the same thing to Jesus when he was here on earth. Meaning, they called him names, and falsely labeled him. They also bullied and chastised him. You are his child. Although, we are all children of God some of us are lost. Those people who are talking about you and making you feel this way are those lost children. Because we are children of God you we will  be taunted; However, we can overcome this through Jesus. He explains it in John 15:20-21. Here is the scripture:

“Do you remember what I told you? ‘A slave is not greater than the master.’ Since they persecuted me, naturally they will persecute you. And if they had listened to me, they would listen to you. They will do all this to you because of me, for they have rejected the one who sent me.”

Therefore, we must stay strong and continue to believe in who we truly are. As far as your date, I want you to have fun and stop worrying about these people and focus on what makes you, you. This is your day and you should dress in what makes you feel nice. He has to learn to accept you just as you are. Of course you should always put your best foot forward, but if you start trying to select things to make him like you, that don’t represent who you are, he is going to like some “off” version of you. To stay in the relationship you will then have to continue to play that character. Sounds exhausting right? Don’t do it! Be you!

When you go on a date you should dress in what makes you feel pretty. There is no true rhyme or reason to this.
However, choosing feminine clothing is always a good idea, but do it in your own way. Most of all, have fun. Remember he is a guy he doesn’t care what you wear as long as it isn’t too pinned or propped.
Stay away from extremes. Keep it simple and appealing to the eye as well as comfortable to you. If you wear something you are not comfortable in it will show. He will surely notice that. Don’t let your clothes define you, you have to define your clothes!
You dig?
I Hope This Helps!
Chauntel
email questions to askchauntel@gmail.com
Also, I am not sure if you have seen this yet, but here is a video that I did on a related topic:

Bath and Body Works Haul – Shower Gels – Lotion – Candles

I am sharing some smell good products that I bought this week at Bath and Body works. They are having their annual sale so I thought I would stop by and see what I could find! The scents mentioned here are absolutely amazing! Let me know if you pick any of them up!

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Advice to Kim Kardashian & Kayne West on How to Survive Year 1 of Marriage

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Hello My Jewels,

So, I am sure that you have heard of the “royal” wedding that united Kim Kardashian and Kayne West in holy matrimony over the weekend. And my ohhhh my did she look stunning to say the least! This dress was a much better option compared to the former dress she wore when she was wedded with Chris Humphries. It fits her shape like a glove, more on than the latter…In this post I will be sharing my advice to Kim and Kayne and other newly-wedded couples!

It is commonly shared that the first year of marriage is the most difficult. You may wonder why? Well there are many things to consider when starting your marriage off.

So here is my advice to Kim and Kanye as well as anyone else who is newly married or will be:

Keep you private conversations private. It is good to have a good friend/or family member as a relief system to talk to outside of your spouse, but don’t share incriminating information because it may cause resentment, unless you are being abused of course.

In lieu of the fact that you have busy schedules, be sure that you are spending quality time together. You may have busy schedules, but the last thing that you want is to be lacking in time spent together. It is just as important as the other things that you wish to do with your time.

Take time to show your appreciation to each-other by doing small little thoughtful things for each-other as a reminder that you care.

During the first year of marriage you learn each-other’s habits and expectations. Some of these are good and some bad.  You may or may not agree with many of them, but you must communicate and establish a common ground. Here is where you learn to compromise.

To have a successful first year of marriage you must pay close attention to detail. What is it that your husband/wife wants and needs. You must identify that. Many times we speak with our eyes. So learn to read their non-verbal cues.

Screen Shot 2014-05-27 at 10.31.53 AMAlso, don’t let the small hick-ups go unresolved. Communicate through every bump in the rode. If you allow bad feelings to grow you will eventually grow resentment towards your spouse. It is essential  that you share your feelings often. Also, be sure that you spend quality time together. Time with your spouse needs to be included in your schedule just like everything else. Relationships take work and they occupy your time.

Be sure to praise your spouse for the things that they are doing well. If you only focus on what they are doing wrong you will find it difficult to make them feel good. They will also feel as though they are not making you happy which will in turn cause them to feel self-conscious. Even though you may not realize it, you two have expectations of each-other. These expectations are usually based off of what you have witnessed as a child as you watched your parents or  “parent-like” figures interact. Be sure to communicate what you expect from each-other in the beginning.

Spend time doing things that you enjoy together, but also sacrifice and do things that each of you separately enjoy even if you personally don’t like those things. You do this because you love each-other.

Spend time with both of your families and friends. Keep it fair!

Share your  life with your spouse. You want to make them feel like they are the center of your world.

I Hope This Helps!

Email Questions to askchauntel@gmail.com, and comment below with your advice!

-Chauntel

Fashion Friday -Fashion Diary – Basic Sweaters & Accessories Haul

http://youtu.be/BJ7AIWcVJts

This series is new and it will feature the items that I am purchasing to update my wardrobe. It is a fashion journey to a new and updated wardrobe. I have been about the same size for the past 15 years and need to rid myself of some items as well as add additional ones to update what I have! You will also see new items that I am buying to bring some vibrance to my wardrobe! Enjoy and let me know if you have some items in your closet that you have been holding on for too long just like me! askchauntel@gmail.com

Videos Mentioned at End:

Africa Fashion Week Los Angeles

Adorn Fashion Show
http://youtu.be/dyIZ8HT9dOc

My Natural Hair – Dry Hair Beauty Haul

The products that I am featuring in this haul video are mostly for dry hair. My hair is very, very, very dry, and I am on a journey to find products that will hydrate my hair and leave it full of life. I achieved bouncy curls with the products that I have mentioned in this video. I plan to do a review on some of them very soon. Let me know if you have used any of these products and what products you do use to help with your hair’s dryness! Many of the products include natural oils, which I love! Tweet me questions @askchauntel

Projects Mentioned can usually bought at your local beauty supply. You can also find them by clicking on  the links below!

Blue Magic Hair Food 12oz Jar

Africa’s Best Organics Hair Mayonnaise, 15 oz – larger than mines

Eco Styler Gel 16oz – Has Olive Oil! Mines did not!

Lottabody Olive Oil Setting Lotion 32 oz – It is a little overpriced here. I bought mines for $10

My New Edgy Look by My Sister Tiffany Rose and Video on the Natural Hair Revolution

My New Edgy Look by My Sister Tiffany Rose and Video on the Natural Hair Revolution

Hey Guys!

So, I am going to spice this blog up a bit. Hopefully you all will like and be accepting of the changes. The content that I post will continue to include dating and relationship advice. However, I will also be sharing business and professional advice too! You will also see fashion and lifestyle blogs as well. This will be the first of many. I am really excited about it, and I hope that you are too!

My sister and I were hanging out yesterday, and she gave me a little make-over. By changing up my hair and giving me bright purple lips she gave me a look that boosted my confidence and gave me a new vibe. If you take the time to add a little something special to your look it will boost your confidence and make you feel great about yourself. It is also simply a lot of fun! So give it a try and tweet me photos @askchauntel

Also be sure to watch my new video featuring my amazing little sister!

 

Love you lots!

Hugs and Kisses!

Chauntel

Art is My Drug Poetry and Art Event – Ask Chauntel Show

http://youtu.be/-C4dHHol6U8

Watch Chauntel interview artist who showcase their talents, you could be the next artist to showcase yourself in the show! If we look deep inside we can find the artist inside of us. Sometimes when we deal with the pain and struggles of life we begin making bad choices to get involved using substances that are harmful to us like drugs and alcohol. It’s time to take a stand against those things and find the expression within us that can help us relieve this pain in a beautiful and artistic way! askchauntel@gmail.com http://www.askchauntel.com

Contact: http://www.artismydrug.com
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Being Bullied and Insecure About Myself

14-year-old Nancy writes:

Hi Chauntel!

So I’m watching your videos right now and I thought it is a good idea to write an email to you.
It’s not going to be an email about boys or something like that. It’s about me and my self-esteem.
When I look at the mirror I don’t see anything bad. But people in my school are bully me because
of my large and bulging (REALLY bulging) eyes. I’m only 14 and I can’t deal with it. What should I do?
Hi Nancy,
It’s funny that it’s your eyes that you point out because I have just the opposite problem. My eyes are so small. When I smile they almost completely go away. In fact when I was a baby my family asked my mom if she was sure that she had taken home the right baby because they thought I looked Chinese.
The reality is, we all have something about ourselves that Make us stand out. However, God made us just the way we are for a specific purpose. Lucky for me I was able to see your picture when you wrote in. What the kids at school don’t know or quite understand is that your beauty is in your eyes.
After reading your question I took a look at your photo, and let me tell you those eyes of yours could take you far in modeling. I am not sure how tall you are, but if you are at leastt 5’9″ you should really consider high fashion modeling. Here is an excellent resource that I found: http:http://www.exploremodeling.com/ If you are not that tall, not to worry they’re are other areas of modeling. However, don’t go into that unless you develop thick skin. I just wanted to mention this to you as an option because I think you’re beautiful and you should give it a try.
Now to address your question specifically, what do you do? You take what they say with a grain of salt. Kids at school are always gonna find something mean to say about each other. It was like that for me, and it is going to be like that for you. If you embrace your beautiful eyes they will eventually leave you alone about it. The only reason they continue to tease you is they know that they are getting to you. If you truly begin to love your eyes, and let what they say role off your sleeve they will notice your confidence and hopefully buzz off.
I was never good with coming up with ways to talk back to people so I would just ignore them or walk away. I know it really hurts. but this is only for a season. It gets better, and once your modeling they will make fun of you because of their jealousy.
So what’s the moral of the story here? People talk, ignore them. You choose your destiny not them. You have the power to wake up every morning and love what you see in the mirror.
By the way here are some successful models with eyes like yours (:
Google both of them. You will see how much of a splash they have made in history, past and present.

What to Wear on a First Date – Fashion Advice – Ask Chauntel

Chauntel shares tips on what you should think about when selecting your outfit for a first date. What should you wear for what occasion. What should you consider? Watch!
http://www.askchauntel.com
http://www.tacalista.com
http://www.forever21.com
askchauntel@gmail.com

The Law of Attraction

14-year-old Nick writes:

Hey Chauntel, I just watched your video on how to approach a girl and stuff like that…. But my situation is a little bit tougher.. I’m 14, I just started high school this year and I noticed this girl kind of right off the bat as soon as I saw her she immediately drew my attention but I cannot get enough courage to talk to her everytime I try I get all nervous start to blush I get butterflies my mind goes all crazy so I back out and just not talk to her. I’ve never talked to this girl before bc of that reason and it’s almost the end of the school year and I’ve never said a word to her. What’s your advice on how to approach her for the first time without making me look like a fool and I can give her a good first impression on how I am?? And I guess I’m kind of pessimistic about this situation bc I doubt my chances of ever being able to date her when the time presents itself and I always think I’m not good enough and my looks aren’t good enough and I don’t wanna wait too long bc she could get swept up by another guy and I don’t want that /: so please if you could answer back with some advice on this situation ASAP it would help me soooo much (: hope to hear back soon!

Hi Nick,

Have you heard of the Law of Attraction? The gist of it is, if you think negatively you will attract negativity. So, if you keep thinking that you have a small chance to attract her, guess what you do.

So what I need you to do is stop thinking of yourself as never getting a chance with her, but start believing that she would be happy to have you.

If you step to a girl without confidence she is not going to take you seriously, and she will not be attracted to you. Also, this is not about putting on a show. All you have to do is be yourself.

As far as your looks go, although I am not sure how you look I want you to know in most cases it really doesn’t matter. I mean face it. Haven’t you seen plenty of beautiful girls with not so hot guys. Do you know why? It is because those girls are attracted to those guys based on that guys confidence. This is not to say that you are not attractive ok.

So moving on. What you need is a game plan. I don’t mean that you need to memorize how the conversation is going to go word for word. If you do that and it doesn’t go the way you planned you will choke.

Here is how you approach her: Walk up to her and say hello. Introduce yourself. Let her introduce herself. Then, give her a compliment. Then have small talk. It could be about anything.

Then create a sense of urgency. Make up an excuse as to why you have to go, or simply tell her that you have enjoyed talking to her, and you would like to get to know her better. This is the time that you ask her for her number. Then you tell her you will talk to her later, and off you go. Whatever you do, stop this negative self talk and believe in yourself. You will be glad you did.

Now, once you have done that you have approached her, and you have left a good thought in her mind of you. Need some help with the next conversation? I have a video for that:

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel