34 and Tired of Online Dating

34-year-old Farzan from Sweden writes:

Hello Chauntel! I have a question and this is easier to ask a woman than a man.

When it comes to internet dating I know what to do, and I have meet many women different ages without problem. But im soo tired of internet and im seeing soo many women looking at me when im outside, at the bus stop, in a caffe and so on. My question is what to DO when a woman stares at u time to time. Im not blind, i know the look, im only shy 🙂 If u can give me few tip i can take it from there. I see sooooo many women look at me and i cant respond and i want to bang my head to a wall of being this shy.

 

computer Hi Farzan,

Women who continue to make eye contact with you are trying to signal to you that they are interested and waiting for you to approach them. I know this can seem odd, or even awkard for most men because guys don’t usually read body language as well as women.

It is just in our nature to send you a signal and wait for you to send one back. The problem with this is that signals can get mixed up and confused at times. So, if you see a women looking your way on a constant basis who slips you a smile, it might be safe to say that she is interested and trying to get your attention. It’s just a subtle way of flirting. So…how do you respond to this, right? I know that is what you were thinking.

You smile back making eye contact then you approach her. Say hello, introduce yourself, and start up a conversation. From there follow up with asking for her number because you enjoyed the conversation. If she is interested, she will comply and slip you her digits. If not, well she might have just been being friendly when she slipped you that smile, but it is definitely worth a try. It beats waiting at your computer glaring at your online dating profile.

Not to say that they don’t work for some, but it is not for everyone. If you don’t like it then don’t do it. Just get out more. Get around people, meet your friends friends. Go where women are, then you will have more to choose from. It is time to get out of your routine. Move away from your bubble so that you can begin meeting more women.

I Hope This Helps,

Chauntel

email questions to askchauntel@gmail.com

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My Crush is Ignoring Me…What Should I Do?

Carmen writes,

Dear Chauntel,

I have a huge problem and I decided to ask you for help. So I went out with my crush and everything was great he told me that he likes me, I told him that I like him too. Then he was begging me to kiss him so I kissed him. We talked and he told me that he wants us to go slow I said ok. He told me that he had a wonderful time with me. I saw him 5 days after out date, he was with his friends and he didn’t even say hi to me! Then I texted him, and he didn’t answer. What should I do??? please help!
Hi Carmen,
Lets not jump to conclusions. It is possible that he did not see you. If you texted him while he was out with his friends he might have overlooked it.
Now, if a few days go by and you still get no communication from him, he is not into you. It is possible that he is not ready to introduce you to his friends. That could mean many different things.
1. He may not know you well enough yet.
2. He is embarrassed of you for some reason or another.
Here is what I would do in your situation. I would wait it out a couple of days. Don’t call him, text him, facebook him, nothing. If he hasn’t hit you up in a few days text him:
“Hey, how are you?”
See if he replies. If he does follow-up with:
“I really enjoyed hangin’ out the other day.”
If he replies, follow up with:
“I was out (wherever it was) the other day, and I saw you out with your friends. I was (explain what you were doing)”
Then see what he responds with. He may play it off like he didn’t see you. Or he may be honest and tell you that he did see you and explain himself. You don’t even have to ask, but I would  NOT accuse him of ignoring you. It is too soon for all of that.
Then, invite him out to do something. See if he is into it. That should give you and idea of where his head is. If he is responsive, then great don’t worry about that little drama. However, if you are still concerned about it just keep an eye on him.
If he takes too long to introduce you to his friends, then something is up. However, it is too soon for you to be concerned. Cool?
I Hope This Helps!
Chauntel
email questions to: askchauntel@gmail.com