Tag: Family

Women are Rejecting Me Sexually – Dating Advice – Ask Chauntel

Published on by Chauntel DelgadoLeave a comment

Donald writes:

Hey Chauntel,

I haven’t been in a relationship for a while (say 3years).
I am into masturbation a lot which makes up for my sexual desires.
I feel like I need a woman to share my life with, but I can’t seem to attract them.
I go out on dates with women, but they seem to not want to sleep with me. Every time we plan to meet up for sex, I was always get excuses for why they couldn’t make it.
Can you help me with how to overcome this problem?
by artur84
by artur84

Hi Donald,

As a result of my Christian values I am an advocate of saving sex until marriage.

To answer your question more specifically, a physical relationship develops after an emotional relationship is underway. Therefore, if you are not building a solid emotional connection with the person you are dating, you will find it very difficult to have a physical one.

So here is my advice, instead of focusing so much on the physical aspect of your relationships, you need to focus on building a solid emotional connection. If a woman feels that she is being used for sex she will automatically reject you. I understand that we all have physical needs and desires, but you are approaching this the wrong way. What you need to do is build a relationship with someone that is true and the rest will come in time!

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel
email questions to askchauntel@gmail.com

Guys Only Want Me For Sex – Dating Advice

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18-year-old Veronica from Maryland writes:

Hey Chauntel,

I have never been in a relationship before. No one has ever taken the time to notice me I guess. I’m in college now, and I got my braces off over the summer before college. Now everyone is saying I look way different from high school. Even though it was a few months ago. Any ways now all these guys approach me wherever I go. Mostly guys in their 20’s and 30’s, never my age. All they want from me is one thing, sex. I want to wait until marriage, and I want a guy that respects me. However, it seems the only thing guys see in me is just another body to add to their list.  I don’t know what to do? I want a relationship not just a fling.

by imagerymajestic
by imagerymajestic

Hello Veronica,

If you want a relationship and not a fling then a relationship you shall have. When I entered college I began to also notice older men showing interest in me. I didn’t know how to deal with it either at first. I soon learned that I was in complete control over myself and the guys I chose to let into my life.

If you want men to respect you, you have to respect yourself by setting a standard for yourself. Guys will only show respect to you as far as you ask for it. It isn’t always in what you say it is in how you carry yourself and the morals and values you set for yourself. You seem like you have some strong ones so I am sure that you will be fine.

Don’t give into the pressures of sex. It won’t be easy, but if you don’t want to just become another number on someone’s list then don’t! Keep yourself for marriage as you said you wanted to. I did, so I know you can too! Keep God in your life, and it will all work out!

And good for you for being awesome!

Be Blessed!

Chauntel

Ps. Here is a video that I produced for a woman with a struggle somewhat related to your situation:

 

 

5 Ways to to Compliment A Guy

Published on by Chauntel DelgadoLeave a comment

Jazzy writes:

Hi Chauntel!

I am in middle school, and I have a boyfriend,. but I’m not sure what to say to compliment him. What are some good compliments that guys like to hear? Also, how am I supposed to react after he gives me a compliment? Am I supposed to compliment him back or just say thanks? This would be so helpful!!

by imagerymajestic
by imagerymajestic

Hi Jazzy,

When it comes to complimenting a guy, they are pretty simple. Just think of ways to play up his ego. Guys love to be complimented on their physical appearance. They also, like to know that you see them as manly.
Here are some simple compliments that you can give a guy that will keep him smiling back at you:
1. Oh you are so funny!
2. I can tell you have been working out!
3. I love being in your arms, you make me feel safe!
4. You are such a manly man!
5.  I love being around you, you make me feel so special!
It is nice to be nice so if he gives you a compliment, feel free to compliment him back. However, you also have to know how to accept a compliment. You don’t always have to spit one back out as soon as you get one.
So in response to his compliment, you can spit one back at him, or you can simply say thank you with a smile.
I Hope This Helps!
Chauntel
email me questions at askchauntel@gmail.com

Encouragement to a Viewer About My Miscarriage – From Almost a Year Ago

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Hey Jewels and Gems!

I received an email this morning that really touched my heart. I decided to share my response to a viewer who shared her miscarriage story with me. She basically thanked me for sharing mines, and expressed her pain of going through this situation.

Feel free to share this with someone who needs it or will be encouraged by it. I am sharing this because I believe  it may help someone else:

Hello Lisa,

I am so glad that you sent your email over. I wish it were under different circumstances, but nonetheless it is nice to meet you!
I am so sorry for your loss. It is very difficult to deal with something like this. I don’t think people really understand the pain associated with a miscarriage until they have actually experienced it.
However, I will say that there are a few people in my life that totally got it, even though it hadn’t happened to them directly. I totally understand what you are going through, and although we may not understand the reason, God knows best.
I am so glad that you have a supportive husband beside you. That makes a world of a difference. Stay encouraged. Don’t jump too early into getting pregnant again. You want your body to heal first. The emotional part will take time, and you will come to peace with it. However, one baby does not replace the last, trust me.
When you are both ready, then try again, and whatever you do, do not blame yourself.
I lost my baby at week 6, and we had shared that I was pregnant with many people. I had even made numerous YouTube videos about it. We had share it with our families, our friends, and church members.
If you choose to hold off sharing this time, as you said you were considering, I understand. However, don’t feel like you have to do that.
Although, people may not understand the depth of your despair, and some individuals will have a way of making you feel like less than a woman, I personally think it is good to share. The reason is for times like these when you end up needing the people around you to give you support. How will they know what you are feeling unless they knew what you were going through?
This is a very personal decision, and one that through prayer I know you will make the best decision for you and your family. I will be praying for you.
I believe the second time around, this time, I still shared my pregnancy with my family at 4 weeks, but we didn’t start sharing it with anyone else until we had an ultrasound with a heartbeat at 7 weeks. We couldn’t be more happy. We were afraid of course. That fear is inevitable, but we also were so excited and we wanted to believe that God was able to pull this one through. Thus far, he has done just that, and we cannot wait to see our little baby. So many people go through this, and some unfortunately go through it numerous times.
The truth is, no matter how far along you are anything can happen. So, I put it in God’s hands. Women at my church prayed over me and my second pregnancy(this one), and that really put my mind at ease. However, there were times that I found myself checking and rechecking that everything was okay when I visited the ladies room. Then, there was a point where I decided, I was going to drive myself crazy unless I put my trust in God. It is a constant struggle. however,  I know he knows best, and then I tell myself why stress about something that you cannot control. Plus, it isn’t helping me or the baby.
I wish you and your family well. I know that God is going to bless you with everything that you need! Stay encouraged.
Lots of Love,
Chauntel
Videos Sharing My Story:

New Video: Should I Choose My Boyfriend Over My Family? – Relationship Advice – Ask Chauntel

Published on by Chauntel Delgado2 Comments

Have you ever been in a situation where it seems like you are not receiving support for your romantic relationship from the people who matter most, your family? How do you handle the situation? Who do you choose, and what do you do? Watch! askchauntel@gmail.com

How to Stop Having Sex With My EX- Relationship Advice – #AskChauntel

Published on by Chauntel DelgadoLeave a comment

Happy New Year Jewels and Gems!

Dealing with a break-up or know someone who is? Chauntel has some great tips on dealing with and overcoming your break-up and dealing with the physical connection you attain during the relationship. You don’t have to go through this alone, there are people around you who care about you and want to help! These basic tips will get you out of your depression and on track to moving on and growing within yourself! Watch!

Videos Mentioned at End:
How to Let Go Of Your Ex

How to Get Over a Break-up

My Bestfriend Likes My Boyfriend – Relationship Advice – Ask Chauntel

Published on by Chauntel DelgadoLeave a comment

Chauntel gives advice to CeCe who is struggling with a few love triangles that include her bestfriend! What should Cece do? See what Chauntel recommends and give your advice!

Stay connect with me!

Kendra Chooses to Stay With Hank Baskett After He Cheated- Should You Stay Married After Infidelity?

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Screen Shot 2014-12-10 at 12.46.09 PMKendra Baskett has been thrust into the spotlight since her time in the Playboy Mansion. The reality star and model starred in the E! reality television series Girls Next Door. This series documented her life as one of Hugh Hefner’s girlfriends. She now headlines her own reality series Kendra on Top. With all of this time in the lime light Kendra has shared intimate moments of her life with a broad audience. Her husband Hank, of six years, allegedly cheated on her with a transexual model, Ava London. Hank was very remorseful and went into a deep depression surrounding the time of his affair, he shares with US Weekly. “For the past two years, I’ve gone through a serious struggle with depression, and during that time I lost the ability to open up toScreen Shot 2014-12-10 at 12.49.50 PM my best friend, Kendra,” Hank told Us Weekly. “I had trouble thinking of the right thing to say the right way, especially in a situation like this, where it’s your word against someone else’s.” When the story about her perfect marriage, looking to be in shambles, broke Kendra found it difficult to deal with all of the pressure of media. However, she handled it gracefully. During, her exclusive interview with Access Hollywood Kendra defended her marriage. Then, in a later interview with Giuliana Rancic, Kendra stated: “I cannot shut this man down. I’m willing to spend the rest of my life trying to figure this out rather than spend one night single.” Whether or not you agree with Kendra’s decision, you must believe that it took a lot of strength for her to stand up against the media’s chastising of her decision to stay with Hank. Do you agree with Kendra’s decision, vote below? My Opinion: I feel that Kendra made this decision based on what was best for her. It’s easy to point fingers and say what she should do, but its her marriage and her life. Unless, you can live it for her, let her make her own decision and don’t ridicule her for it! We can all take time to judge what Hank has done, and most would tell her to leave him. However, we do not have all the facts, and we are not in their relationship. If their love is strong enough to survive, then let it go on! But Kendra, if these patterns with Hank continue get-out-of-dodge!

First French Kiss Advice

Published on by Chauntel DelgadoLeave a comment

Anna writes:

Hi Chauntel,

I have a boyfriend, and we have already kissed.  But now i think we will French Kiss. I really want to but don’t know how. I am really nervous and scared.

Please write me back if you can.
Big fan of yours. Love Anna
Hi Anna,
Thanks so much for your question. You made a very important statement, that you really want to. I want to make sure that, that is absolutely true because you should not be forced or encouraged into doing anything that makes you feel uncomfortable.
Screen Shot 2014-11-07 at 10.58.53 AMNow, I am not a kissing expert, haha. However, what I can tell you is that this is something that you learn in the moment. Just follow his lead, go with the flow. You will quickly learn.
Most importantly take it slow. There is nothing attractive about a forceful tongue, when force is not wanted or needed. So, don’t rush it just let it happen slowly. You will get the hang of it.
Remember, to protect yourself. His hands should stay around your waist, not above or below. If he tries any funny business. Politely move his hands back to where they should be. He will get the message. If not, there is something wrong with that picture.
Thanks for your support!
I Hope This Helps!
Chauntel
email questions to askchauntel@gmail.com Tweet/Insta @askchauntel

How to Keep Your Husband’s Attention – Marriage Advice

Published on by Chauntel Delgado1 Comment

Screen Shot 2014-11-05 at 12.41.18 PMHello Jewels! This one is for all of my married ladies out there! I hope to be writing to you more often! So send me questions about your woes to askchauntel@gmail.com, or click contact above. So, we women have a lot of responsibility. The twenty first century woman is no less busy than her predecessors. Although, some of her tasks may have been made easier through modern technology, modern society has found a way to pile up the tasks even higher. They require time and energy. Let’s consider, a modern day women has to take care of the home, take care of herself, take care of her children, take care of her husband, and work a job. Now these big responsibilities are filled with many small ones, that shall remain nameless at this point. So how can a modern day women accomplish all of her responsibilities well, while still making her husband feel loved and appreciated and keep her head? Well let’s be honest, it is no easy suit. It really comes down to time management. Ok, so no body is perfect but spending some time planning and prioritizing your man’s needs into your life is essential. True, it is not that he doesn’t matter, even though he may begin to feel a little unappreciated at times. In fact it is quite the contrary. With the added responsibility of children and a job the husband can sometimes suffer a little bit of lost of our time. Screen Shot 2014-11-05 at 12.53.11 PMIt is therefore, essential that we as women plan our time accordingly and keep time with him as a constant priority. Now, don’t stress yourself out in the process, just make a conscious effort to plan time with him. It may not work out perfectly everyday, but you have to give it a go. He will know if you are trying. The last thing that we want, is our man to feel that we could care less about him. So here is some friendly advice to keep his attention and his attraction on you. 1. Exercise – Now, we know beauty doesn’t last forever visually, but let’s help it as much as we can by keeping our body and health up. It will keep your body looking and feeling beautiful. 2. Have Some Me Time – Time to reflect, meditate, pray, relax is very essential to keeping your mind at ease. It will help you to stress out less. This will in turn keep down arguments between you and your spouse and children. It will also keep you from being high strung and naggy. 3. Spend Some Alone Time With Him Often – The two of you have to decide exactly how often is often, but you must have a weekly goal that you should try to reach on time that you spend alone together. 5. Have a Date Night – These should occur weekly. 6. Fulfill His Requests – Well you know what they are! Listen to his concerns and be sure to highlight those areas of you that he finds attractive. 7. Look Your Best – Just because you’re married it doesn’t mean your dead. So wear lingerie for him. Be cute around the house as much as you can! Just take care of yourself. 8. Compliment Him – Let him know how much you love and appreciate him! Compliment him on specific things that he does that you enjoy! Having a Hard time prioritizing and setting that goal? Check Out My Video: How to Set a Goal and Plan for Success

Well ladies, I hope this helps! Send questions to askchauntel@gmail.com Tweet/Insta @askchauntel