In this video I share what happens when you have no kissing chemistry. I also share five first kissing mistakes!
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In this video I share how to find and keep Mr. Right! I have been married for 4.5 years and dated my husband for 5 years before we got married. Now we have a little girl, and we are so blessed. I thought I would share some tips that I learned a long the way that your girlfriends just might not tell you! If you are looking for Mr. Right this video should help! Check it out!
If you are looking for life coaching, relationship or marriage help, I offer private coaching by email or even one-on-one coaching sessions. Here is more info:
15-year-old Nancy writes:
Hi Chauntel,
Ijust watched your video on long distance relationships and strict parents and i need advice , so im moving an hour away in the summer but im going to be staying at my aunts house during the week to finish school where im living now. my boyfriend knows , and my parents met his parents and him and i met his parents and stuff ,but my parents consider him as my ” friend ” i think they know were dating but they dont want to accept that cause they dont want me to have a boyfriend at my age , they let me go out with him and stuff but my mom said once we move i can’t talk to him anymore and i really don’t want that to happen because i don’t want to lose him i know we can work things out . Currently , we see each other every weekend , if not every weekend we see each other every other weekend or every two weekends. He’s going to be my partner for my sweet 16, so i know ill be seeing him at the practices definitely . And when we go out , we’ve been going bowling , to the movies , and to eat. But it gets boring after a while . What other things could i do that my parents would allow ? We FaceTime everyday , but my mom doesn’t want me talking to him during the week , i still do but she doesn’t know. I get really upset and he does to because he thinks im gonna break up with him when i move , but im not . I trust him 100% and he trusts me but i get jealous easily and i feel like he’s gonna cheat on me i know he won’t cause he’s loyal very loyal , but i just feel like a girl will attract him because hes transfering to a different school where a lot of girls that like to flirt with other girls boyfriends . i talk to him about how i feel about him finding another girl but he says it will never happen, that he plans on spending the rest of his life with me , i want the same . Please give me advice thank you(:
Hi Nancy,
At 15, you must respect your parents wishes. If they do not allow you to see him after you move, you cannot. However, you can try to convince them that you are responsible and show them that your relationship is not hindering you.
You can do this by keeping your grades up in school and staying on the right path. This may allow them to see that being in a relationship is not negatively effecting you.
As far as your relationship with him, you say that you trust him, but I am not sure that you do. You seem unsure about yourself when you question if another girl will attract him.
Now, it is possible that the distance will cause some strain on your relationship, and there may be other girls around him that are interested in him. The same goes for you. However, if you to choose to stay together and stay faithful to each other, you will just have to learn to trust him.
If he is worthy of your trust, you don’t want to be paranoid and push him away.
Another thing, you are worried about things out of your control, you just have to role with the punches at this point. See what happens, you cannot predict the future so don’t mole over it.
Just relax and enjoy the ride.
I would like to leave you with a Bible verse. I think you will find comfort in it as I have in the past, and still do today.
Let God light your path. This way he can guide your decisions and be with you through the good times and hard times because hard times will come.
Isaiah 26:3.- NIRV
“Lord, you will give perfect peace
to those who commit themselves to be faithful to you.
That’s because they trust in you.”
Be Blessed,
Chauntel
email questions to askchauntel@gmail.com or tweet me @askchauntel
Have you ever been in a situation where it seems like you are not receiving support for your romantic relationship from the people who matter most, your family? How do you handle the situation? Who do you choose, and what do you do? Watch! askchauntel@gmail.com
♥So, you finally survive through choosing the perfect Christmas gift, then you look up and it’s already time for another thoughtful gift. A Valentines Day gift! What is a guy to do?
I understand your frustration guys, and I hear the pain. So, I thought I would provide you with a guide to selecting the perfect Valentines Day gift!
Why? Well there is a large margin for error on this special day. Whether you have been in a relationship for a while, or if you just started dating, either reality causes for apprehension.
A Valentines Day gift is not like Birthday or Christmas gift, it is a very personal gift. The gift is symbolic of LOVE. It can be given between family, friends, or lovers.
But, the Question is what do you buy? Do you buy it, should you make it? Does it have to have a certain price point? All great questions, and the answer is different for every person.
1. The Gift Should Not Be Something that You Want
You shouldn’t get her your favorite candy, so that the two of you can “share.”
2. The Gift Should Not Hint Towards Something Underlying
For example, don’t buy your husband/wife a gym membership to hint towards that fact that you want him/her to loose weight.
3. Don’t Be Cheap
The value of a gift is not always monetary. It should be something that you had to spend some time thinking about. You don’t have to empty you wallet, but you must remember the gift value is presenting their love value. It’s not about the money you spend it’s about the meaning behind the gift.
4. Don’t Re-gift
If you gave the gift to your X, it’s probably not a good idea to give it to your new girl. So, take time to find a gift that is unique to her, or him. It looses it’s value, meaning, and thoughtfulness if it was given before.
5. Don’t Give Cheap Chocolate if You Are Over 16
Cheap chocolate tastes cheap. Ah! Gross! You would be better off buying a candy bar and adding a thoughtful card than buying a cheap box of chocolate and handing if over!
6. Don’t Buy A Card and Only Sign the Bottom
Buy a card to go with your gift, is such a great idea. It displays that you want to express in words how much the person means to you. However, if you sign a blank card that only says “Happy Valentines Day” It makes your card dry and cold. Add a bit of your own handwriting, then sign your name!
7. Don’t Buy a Birthday or Christmas Gift
Although jackets, shoes, and vacuums may be needed, a more special gift should be considered, like a necklace, earrings or a teddy bear.
8. Don’t Give Only Perishable Items
Flowers, and chocolate are great gifts for Valentines, but don’t forget the card or the teddy bear. Why? You want her to have something to remember you by. Something she can look at and think of you. She may be thinking of you as she bites into that yummy piece of chocolate, but she can keep the card to read and look over and over again.
♥16-year-old Alisha writes:
I have been talking to and dating this boy on and off for about a year. Throughout the relationship we’ve had arguments, and he has done me very wrong. However, I was always quick to forgive him just to get back to our happiness. I hope you can get back to me, there is so much more to this story. I know he is not good for me, and he did me wrong. I love him tho, i truely do. We have fun and alot of goodtimes and memories together.
Hi Alisha,
This is very simple. You have said it all. This guy is no good for you. Why drag this out? I understand that your feelings for him are strong, but that does not excuse his behavior. You should walk away before you get deeper into this and get to a place where it is hard to recover your feelings. Be strong, you will get through this.
Thanks,
Chauntel
email questions to askchauntel@gmail.com
16-year-old Cecie writes:
Hey Chauntel,
I just had my first relationship with my best friend, and I like him. He is very good, but I kinda feel weird to act romantic and stuff. So most of the time, I avoid it. I feel like I’d rather be more of his best friend than a girlfriend. So I really don’t know what to do plz help. I am kinda having second thoughts about it.
Hi Cecie!
Yikes! This is a tough situation to be in. I would say, once you overstep that friendship boundary it can be difficult to go back.
When I read your question, it immediately made me think of a rubber-band as a metaphor.
I have three possible scenarios for you. Let’s say that your relationship is the rubber-band.
The first scenario is you pull the rubber-band so far apart that it immediately breaks. O’Boy does that hurt! If he is “falling” for you it will be very difficult for your relationship to spring back from “romantic” to “friend-zone”. He may be so hurt by it that he walks away completely, because of a broken heart.
The second scenario is you have pulled the rubber-band so far apart and although it did not quite break, it stretched. Meaning, the original fibers no longer go back into place as they once were. At that point there is nothing you can quite do about it, but try to build from where you are.
Occasionally, when you stretch a rubber-band it may spring back into its original shape. Therefore, depending on how strong your friendship is, it could go back to how it was before, but only time will tell. And it is very unlikely that your relationship will not suffer any damages from these changes. Once you decide to to transition your relationship from “friend” to “romance” going back the other way again is nearly impossible without any change occurring within the relationship. I am very doubtful that it will.
In these situations, there is usually one person whose feelings are stronger than the other.
He might find it difficult to ignore the fact that the dynamics of the relationship have changed. It may be that his feelings may have grown too strong for you at this point, or there is also the possibility that he feels exactly the same way and also doesn’t see the sparks flying. In this case he will be open to walking back into a friendship. He is the only one who can tell you how he feels, and only time will tell how he will react.
So, what should you do? Give it some time until you really know how you feel. At this point, you don’t sound too sure about how you feel. Speaking against the relationship before you truly know how you feel could be detrimental. I would wait it out for a little while. Once your feelings are more clear you have to verbalize them to him.
You have to first be honest with yourself, then you have to be honest with him. If he really values your friendship he will work through it. He might need some time to adjust, and you need to give him that time.
I Hope This Helps!
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Ever been in a situation where someone else is interested in your boyfriend or girlfriend? How do you handle the situation?
When it comes to age and dating, it seems that many times younger women are attracted to older men. Why is that? What causes this fascination? Watch and comment below!
Stacey writes:
Hello Chauntel,
Me and this guy have been hanging out every single day since we met for the past 3 months. Everyone thinks that were a couple and in a relationship because of our chemistry and that we look good together. I have been embracing our friendship and enjoying our time together he hugs me too and kisses me in public hold me and treats me like his girlfriend his family even thinks we’re together. He did tell me that he had commitment issues but only recently did he say he doesn’t see us as a item meaning he was pulling the friend card on me. What does this mean and what should I do because I am completely confused on how to people can be so good together in one can’t see that.
Hi Stacey,
Well, if you continuously went into this knowing that he has commitment issues, you couldn’t expect anything more.
Now this is not to say, that you shouldn’t want more. Just because it may seem like you are together to other people and it may even feel like it to you sometimes you know the truth, you are not. Don’t torture yourself with pretending that this is not the reality.
You have complete control over this situation. Either you are going to accept this situation just as it is, or you are going to part ways with this guy.
If he doesn’t want to commit you cannot, nor should you force him to. Don’t waste too much time here. Treat it as a casual dating relationship and keep dating other guys. He needs to get his feelings together, then you might have a shot at a real relationship. Until then you may as well just have fun with no strings attached. I know this isn’t what you want, but it is what you have.
If you don’t want it anymore, then let him know. At that point he may or may not choose to continue a relationship with you, the type of relationship that you want.
I Hope This Helps!
Chauntel
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