When your marriage is falling apart, and may you wonder how you can fix it. If you feel alone and unsure of how to get it back on track, then please know that there is hope for the future. Remember a happy marriage is how it all began. Here are a few secrets to building an even better marriage, even when it feels like you have nothing more to give.
- Listen Better: Sometimes when our husband speaks up we focus so much on what we are thinking and feeling, that we allow our thoughts to get in the way of hearing their feelings and concerns.
- Observe With More than Your Eyes: Verbal communication is just one way that we express ourselves. Pay close attention to his non verbal cues such as facial expressions, eye contact, and hand gestures. You might learn more about how your husband is feeling.
- Compliment Him: A simple compliment can go such a long way. When he does the things that you like from him to do follow it up with verbal praise! He needs you to uplift him! If you always focus on the bad, he will feel criticized by you! This will be demotivate him to give you the things that you want from him.
Proverbs 15:1-2 “A soft answer turns away wrath,
But a harsh word stirs up anger.
2 The tongue of the wise uses knowledge rightly,
But the mouth of fools pours forth foolishness.”
- Meet His Needs: You know what they are, so make sure they are being met. If you don’t know what they are, then here is where you we need to start talking to him more. When his needs are addressed he will be much happier.
- Let Stuff Go: It’s easy to get caught up in the past, and it is harder to move past what has happened to make for a better future. Now, if you have not dealt with the pain of the past, then that is the conversation that you need to have with him. If you have communicated about it, then stop “working on it” and let’s move past it, or it will sabotage the rest of your relationship.
Matthew 6:14 “For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you”
- Be Merry: He already has enough challenge to deal with being a man in the world around him. It is your job to be his happy place, “His Sunshine”. After all, who wants to be around a person who is complaining and argumentative all of the time. Be the kind of person you want to call, talk to, text, or spend time with.
- Be Exciting: Put simply, boring is boring. So if you aren’t doing anything to be interesting then start doing something with your time. You won’t have anything to talk about besides your monotonous daily tasks unless you do something fun! So, do something that you find interesting and become someone interesting for the both of you. If you are doing things, then share them with him. If he doesn’t care about them, then sister we have a whole other problem, and he might be the one needing coaching. I’ll tell him, no worries 🙂
- State Your Needs: Women can be very subtle in how we deliver information as to not offend anyone, especially our men. What most women do not realize is men do not get hints most of the time. So if you want or need something, you better spell it out. Otherwise, he will be super confused when you refer to the task that you had only alluded to before, he will have no idea what you were talking about.
Matthew 7:7-8 – “Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.”
- Ask Questions: If you are unsure about anything in your relationship, or anything concerning your man, then girl you need to talk to him. How do you expect to know or have clarity if you don’t open your mouth and ask for it. I know sometimes this is easier said than done, and sometimes the truth does hurt. So if you are going to ask, just know you may or may not like the answer.
- Give Him Support: There is nothing a man loves more than a woman who shows up for him. Ask him questions about the things that he loves, show that you want to learn more. Be involved and what he does even if it isn’t your thing. It will make him feel loved.
These tips will help brighten any marriage!
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