21-year-old Saleh writes:
How are you? I hope you are doing fine. I hesitated a lot before emailing you because first I have never sought advice from someone online second I think my problems are typical and you have talked about some of them in your videos.
Im a 21 year engineering student this is my first semester and I hate it I am planning to change my major but I do not know to what. I do not know what I really like and want in life.
As far as I know you are a psychology major right? How was that was it easy? I like psychology and I had some major quizzes and personality test online and they say that I should major in psychology my personality type is INFJ
I am alson homosexual and never been in a relationship I lack confidence and self-esteem I hate myself and my life I am so miserable I want to feel love I want someone who likes me the way I am.
I am glad that you took the time to email me.
I am doing well thank you. I have been having a lot of fun responding to questions since I graduated from graduate school. It has given me the opportunity to put ideas into action.
Finding out what you like, and want in life takes time. You don’t just wake up one day and instantly know who you are. It takes time. However, you need to play an active role in the process. you should be constantly looking into new things and learning about yourself. Be patient, it will take you time to figure that out.
I assume that you watched my video I made a few years ago on choosing a college major. I therefore, will not repeat everything I said in that video. If you have not seen it, I will paste it below. The gist of it is, take classes in different areas and see what peaks your interest and where you think you could see yourself. Once you have began to narrow down areas of interest by taking classes and personality and career tests go visit a counselor in that department.
They should be able to give you more information on jobs in the field and different areas you can pursue within the field. Very soon, I will also be offering a coaching workshop for this topic.
In the meantime, let me answer the rest of your questions.
Yes, I was a psychology major. I have earned my BA and MA in psychology. Was it easy, no. LOL. Psychology is hard, but I was intrigued by it and stuck with it. To be a psychology major you have to be a good writer, researcher, and reader. You also will learn how to run statistical analysis. Most psychologist are in the field to help people. There are so many fields of psychology that you can purse. However, if you are thinking of going into this field because you think it’s easy, go in another direction.
Don’t just choose a major because it sounds good. Do so because you actually like it and can see yourself working in the field. Otherwise you are just waisting your time and money. Also, don’t keep changing majors, try to actually figure out what you want to do, then change your major.
When it comes to counselors or advisors, sometimes they care and sometimes they don’t so know your stuff for yourself. And even after taking a career test, ensure that you agree. Don’t just major in something because the career test told you, or because your counselor said their major was the best at the college.
To respond to the last part of your question, before you go looking for someone else to love you. You need to love yourself. That is like saying you want to run before you can crawl. First of all, it is a bad idea, and second it is impossible. It will end badly. I have a video below on how to gain self confidence.
I Hope This Helps!
16-year-old Rawan writes:
I am struggling really bad with choosing a college major & there is nobody to help me. My family cares about prestige & heres why I got influenced by them to choose a major thats prestigious! 😦 I got into Law school & then I switched to another university to study Economics. I am so confused I dont know what I want. There are no advisors in my country.
Choosing a college major can be difficult. It is a lot of responsibility to make a decision like this at such a young age when you are still learning who you are as a person.
However, the best way to go about this is select according to what you love to do. Think about what you want to do on a day-to-day basis. Then find out jobs that incorporate your interests. The reality is, it is not about the title. It is about what you are actually doing everyday. Some people have the same title, but work in different industries and therefore have different experiences at work.
Start with what you like to do. Then begin thinking about what you are passionate about. The major will find you.
Let me also advise you. Although, it is important that you are respectful of your family, you are going to be the one going to work everyday. Therefore, you do not want to choose a major for them. You need to choose to do something that you love. Do you know why?
BECAUSE you are going to be the one going to school and suffering through the classes. You are also going to be the one working everyday. You don’t want to walk into a job you hate. If you do you wil hate your life.
I Hope This Helps!
Ps. Check out this video if you haven’t already: